Michelle Williams Breaks Her Silence on Heath Ledger's Death
Credit: Dan MacMedan/WireImage.com
Nearly three years after Heath Ledger died of an accidental drug overdose, Michelle Williams is finally opening up about her former boyfriend (and father to Matilda, 5).
"In a strange way, I miss that year, because all those possibilities that existed then are gone," Williams, 30, tells Nightline of the 12 months that followed Ledger's death.
To cope with the loss, Williams began reading The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion.
"It didn't seem unlikely to me that he could walk through a door or could appear behind a bush," Williams says. "It was a year of very magical thinking, and in some ways I'm sad to be moving further and further away from it."
Williams, who began a three-year relationship with Ledger after costarring in Brokeback Mountain, says she can "understand" why people "relate" to her tragedy -- but she still has difficulty wrapping her head around the situation.
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"I've found meanings around the circumstance, but the actual event itself still doesn't..." she says before trailing off. "I can't find a meaning for it. I can find meanings in things and people and relationships that have sprung up, and friendships that have strengthened. I can find a lot of meaning in that, but not in why."
"I know I got kind of obsessed with that for awhile, the before and after. A lot of things died," Williams says as she fights back tears. "There's a line from a book that gave me so much comfort and it said, 'When you've truly lost everything, then at least you can become rich in loss.'"
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These days, Williams is back to her smiley self -- especially when probed about her reported relationship with her Blue Valentine costar Ryan Gosling.
"She's like Brigitte Bardot meets Clint Eastwood. She's like a sexy cowboy or something," Gosling gushes of the single mom. "Creatively, we are doing it. Creatively."
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When asked if they were ever romantically involved, the actor -- who is currently linked to Blake Lively -- clams up. "No, we're professionals," he insists.
Adds Williams: "He looks like he's lying, but he's not!"
Tell Us What You Think
13I lost my boufriend three years ago, and I know exactly how Michelle Williams feels. You do lose a year of your life when the person you love passes. It took me a long time to finally talk about the passing of my boyfriend and three years later I can finally talk about the emotion around it. She is an amazing women raising their daughter alone and keeping her head high from all the negative publicity she is getting for finally opening up. I wish you much happiness in your new life, I look up to you so much! xoxo
Sometimes talking about something so painful helps you deal with it. It's not like I want to get into something so personal, but it's more meaningful than "angelina and brad's pda" or what young female star has gone off the deep end this time. Those are people using these stories for fame, she isn't. And it's people who think she is probably lack any kind of concern for anyone but themselves.
Why do the US Weekly readers think they can determine when it is OK for Michelle Williams talks about this part of her life?? Get over yourselves, you don't get to decide.
She talks about it now, and people accuse her of using it for publicity. If she'd talked about it then, she would have been accused of cashing in on his death. D*mned if you do, d*mned if you don't. I wish her and her precious daughter much happiness.
Amen, Klaudia. Why talk about it at all? It's no ones business, and she should just tell them it's private. It got her some press, though, so I guess all is well.
Klaudia,the interviewer kind of made the whole thing about that when the movie she is promoting is what I think she was there for. It was short and there was like a full minute with Ryan Gosling (her costar). It was kind of strange.
My sister committed suicide 3 yrs ago at the age of 24, and yes it's taken this long for me to really absorb it. I think she's very strong to talk about it at all. I still don't talk about my sister.
who cares if it took three years?? geez get over yourself Filomena....she does not owe anyone any favors
It seems as if celebs "open up" about many things when a movie or book is coming out.
filomena, I really don't think it's for YOU to decide when SHE speaks to the media about HER private feelings!! Be serious!
Filomena, why should she have to say anything at all? If you watched the interview you would see that it's still extremely difficult for her to talk about him without crying. God bless her and her beautiful little angel Matilda.
Yea three years later, she should have done this sooner, no?
I feel for her and her daughter. It is very hard to lose someone that close to you in such a sudden and tragic way.. I am glad that she is happy now though and trying to move on.