If anyone has an opinion on the late-night TV shuffle happening at NBC, it's David Letterman.
In his monologue for Tuesday's broadcast of CBS' Late Show with David Letterman, the comic jokes about the fates of his comrades Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien. (NBC plans to move The Jay Leno Show to 11:35 pm, thereby moving O'Brien's Tonight Show back 30 minutes; O'Brien announced Tuesday his refusal to host the show if is is moved past midnight.)
Letterman kids "I knocked off another competitor!" and suggests that President Obama get involved in replacing O'Brien. But Leno, Letterman says, can't be blamed for the departure of Simon Cowell from American Idol.
More snippets from his timely monologue include:
"Things are getting interesting in late night television. You know what's going on, ladies and gentlemen? Chaos and craziness and mayhem...you know what this means -- that's right, I knocked off another competitor."
"But listen to this: if Conan does leave The Tonight Show, President Obama then has to appoint a replacement."
"And then I got a call just before I came out here from NBC, and they said, 'Look, look, we still don't want you back.'"
"And now, so Jay Leno apparently is moving back to 11:30, and this has been hard on my mom. It's been tough on my mom because for the last six months she's been forced to watch me."
"According to the New York Times, Al Qaeda is claiming responsibility for the wreckage at NBC."
"Simon Cowell is leaving American Idol, but don't worry - we've checked and Jay's fingerprints are nowhere on this one."