In her first interview in nearly seven years, Whitney Houston goes into shocking detail about the abuse she allegedly endured during her tumultuous 14-year marriage to ex-husband Bobby Brown.
"He slapped me once, but he got hit on the head three times by me," Houston, 46, told Oprah Winfrey in a two-part interview that began airing Monday.
She even recalled one argument where an allegedly drunk Brown, 40, spat on her.
She told Winfrey she "was horrified he spit on me, in my face" and that left her "very hurt, very angry."
Added Houston, "He had such hate in his eyes for me, because I loved him so much."
Their marriage got so bad, she said, that Brown was cutting her head off pictures and painting evil eyes on their bedroom walls with spray paint.
She said she always thought things would get better.
"He was my drug," Houston said of her ex-husband. "I didn't do anything without him."
That included drugs.
Houston battled addictions to cocaine and marijuana.
She recalled how her mother Cissy Houston even enlisted sheriff's deputies to force the singer into rehab. She told her daughter, "'I'm not losing you to the world. I'm not losing you to Satan. ... I want my daughter back,'" Houston said.
"She said, 'If you move, Bobby, they're gonna take you down. Don't you make one move,' " Houston tells Winfrey. "And he stood there like -- he was scared."
During her marriage, Houston — who filed for divorce in 2006 and has custody of their daughter, Bobbi Kristina, 16 — said she often tried to please her husband by downplaying her own success.
"I tried to play down all the time," said Houston, whose new album, I Look to You, debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard charts by selling 304,801 copies. "I used to say, 'I'm Mrs. Brown, don't call me Houston.'"