Perhaps there’s nothing that will make you realize everything you’ve done wrong in your relationship faster than watching your spouse get close with someone else — at least, that was the theory behind the Tuesday, January 24, episode of Seven Year Switch. The temporary couples were about to head off for romantic getaways, but before that happened, they had to watch video footage of their real spouses together. It probably goes without saying that some people handled this exercise better than others.
Jaclyn Threatens to Punch Kelsey in the Face
As Jaclyn and James watched footage of Kelsey and Dustin, Jaclyn immediately began counting how many drinks fun-loving Kelsey had — and how much she was casually touching Dustin. “I don’t like that she was touching him,” Jaclyn said. “I felt like she was flirting.” James wasn’t as vocal, but his facial expression spoke volumes as he watched his wife down liquor and caress Dustin’s arm.
Interestingly, Jaclyn didn’t think Dustin was doing anything wrong, arguing that he hadn’t been flirting back with Kelsey. (What video was she watching?) James sort of defended Kelsey, saying she was just flirtatious by nature, though he admitted that she didn’t flirt with him anymore. (Insert sad face here.) Jaclyn said if she found out that Dustin and Kelsey kissed, she would end their relationship “then and there.” Later, Jaclyn brought it up again, saying she was “going to have to punch [Kelsey] in the face.” James didn’t really respond to that.
Kelsey Calls Dustin an “Ass”
When the tables were turned, and Kelsey and Dustin watched footage of Jaclyn and James, Kelsey got really annoyed with her husband. She seemed especially irked when James told Jaclyn that Kelsey refused to ever talk about anything serious. Kelsey whined that James was “putting on a show,” because in reality, he was “honestly kind of an ass.”
Dustin didn’t seem remotely surprised when Jaclyn referred to him as a kid and didn’t seem like he cared much about anything Jaclyn said at all. Instead the focus was on Kelsey, who revealed that she and James had an argument on their honeymoon because James thought the bikini she was wearing was too revealing. She said in that moment she worried she had made the wrong choice in mate. For what it’s worth, it seemed highly unlikely Dustin would ever tell Kelsey to cover up.
Heather and Tony Head to the Farm
Seriously. Their romantic getaway was to a farm because Heather loved the peace and quite of the great outdoors. These two had bonded almost instantly due to the fact that they were both givers and pleasers by nature. Tony commented that Heather was very “comforting” in a way that Liliya was not. Heather commented that she felt it was easier for Tony — a man she had known for only a few days — to open up to her than her own husband. (When Liliya and Aaron watched the footage of Heather and Tony, they immediately recognized that their spouses were bonding in a way they simply were not.)
Heather and Tony made s’mores, drank wine and completed the (slightly bizarre) no-touch massage exercise without any issues. As background: The no-touch massage was exactly what it sounds like and amounts to running one’s hands over someone else’s body without any actual contact. At the end of the day, Heather forced Tony to take the bed since he had given it to her every night until this. He reluctantly agreed, but even through his protest, it was clear he really valued the way she was treating him.
Liliya and Aaron Have a Breakthrough
Primed by the footage of their spouses bonding, Liliya and Aaron finally started to reflect on their own actions and admit that they were not the world’s most open people. After some awkward exchanges about whether they would share the only bed in the room or not, they reluctantly did the no-touch massage exercise. While they didn’t seem to enjoy it much, it did serve its purpose, getting them to talk about their feelings.
In a strange twist, Liliya broke down in tears. “You only get one life,” she told Aaron as tears welled in her eyes. “It’s not fair to go through life and not try to make yourself happy. What kind of life is that?” Aaron said he realized that he was “an emotional degenerate” and tended to be very blocked off. They ultimately decided to sleep in the same bed, head to foot.
James Struggles With the No-Touch Massage
Jaclyn and James headed to Palm Springs, which Jaclyn had never even heard of until their trip. (Huh?) Once they arrived, they got the memo about the no-touch massage, and to say that James was uncomfortable with that proposition would be the understatement of the century. He looked like he was about to have a panic attack at the prospect of having to do this, and Jaclyn told the camera that he was being a “drama queen.” They finally completed the exercise as quickly as possible, and both agreed it was pretty dumb.
Later, they hung out and went night swimming. Jaclyn confessed that she felt she and Dustin were going their separate ways. “Hopefully Kelsey teaches him something, so that he’ll appreciate me more, and we can get back to being in love.” Hey — a girl can hope!
Dustin and Kelsey Get Soaking Wet
Dustin and Kelsey kicked off their Santa Barbara trip by jumping into the ocean fully clothed. Kelsey loved Dustin’s “superadventurous and fun” side and said it made her wonder if he would be more adventurous in the bedroom as well. They completed the touchless massage exercise without any glitches, though they both also thought it was dumb.
“It’s a mouthless b–wjob,” Dustin shrugged. “I don’t understand what the whole point of doing this is.” He then spent a few minutes complaining that it was making him “miserable” that he was in such close quarters with Kelsey but wasn’t supposed to sleep with her. Excuse Us while we wipe away our tears.
Tell Us: Do you think Dustin and Kelsey are going to sleep together?
Seven Year Switch airs on FYI Tuesdays at 9 p.m. ET.
