HILLS RECAP: Heidi Montag Tells Spencer Pratt to Move Out

PLUS: Lauren Conrad rebounds with a sexy Frenchman

On last night's premiere of The Hills, Lauren and Whitney arrive in Paris to help out at the Crillon Ball for Teen Vogue. “It’s a new world for you,” their driver cautions. “Everything is different.” Then we see them running errands for the magazine and talking about boys.

Back in the USA, while Heidi is spending some quality time with her parents in Crested Butte, Colorado, a depressed Spencer tells his sister how he’s going to win Heidi back by surprising her. She-Pratt tells him to respect Heidi’s request for space. “You need, like, a manual or something,” she says. Then realizes an easier remedy: “I mean, I guess you could just write a list of everything you’ve done and do the exact opposite.”

Lauren gets a call from Audrina, who says that she saw Brody at Les Deux kissing a girl he was calling his girlfriend. To get her mind off the news, LC and Whitney go out with some guys from the band Rock and Roll, one of whom has a penchant for wearing his shirt unbuttoned to his waist and twirling his mustache like a cartoon villain. When they get back to the hotel, Lauren consults her English to French dictionary and learns how to say “Brody is scum.”

Heidi seems to have found some moxie in Colorado. First, when Spencer explains the reason for his visit, she cuts him off and says, “Right, it’s about you. It’s all about you.” Then, at an awkward dinner with her parents, she tells him that if he really respected her, he wouldn’t have come to visit at all. Finally, she gives him a speech about wanting to get her friends back in her life and tells him to move out of their apartment by the time she returns to L.A.

Meanwhile, before leaving for the Crillon Ball, Lauren discovers that she’s burned her borrowed Alberta Ferretti dress with her curling iron. After shedding some tears, she somehow convinces the store to loan her a second frock. From the show, it’s kind of unclear what the Crillon Ball is, but apparently Whitney isn’t fulfilling her Teen Vogue duties for it and her boss recommends that she pursue styling instead. At the end of the evening, the guitarist for Rock and Roll propositions Lauren with the perfect opportunity for ruining another ball gown: a midnight tour of Paris on his Vespa. She accepts. The dress is fine. The trip is over. Both she and Heidi – in their own ways – have learned so much. Meaningful stares all around.

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BY ABBEY GOODMAN