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Paris Hilton Inspires Fear In Animals
Monday December 18, 2006
![]() In light of Paris Hilton being named the second worst celebrity dog owner of 2006 for treating her canines as “accessories,” we decided to investigate her relationships with pets in general. And as a wise man doing the voiceovers for Mastercard commercials once said, “There are some things that money can’t buy.” Clearly, the love of animals is one of them. How else do you explain this photo retrospective of Hilton's travails into the mammalian commonwealth? Every one of these animals is turning the furry cheek away from Paris with legs-aflailing, or basically assuming the universal “get me the hell out of here” position. She’s having to apply a fierce hand tourniquet to the cat’s tail to keep it under control. Even the monkey is looking around for another shoulder to sit on. When your clavicle is being shunned by a primate dressed as if it is the sheriff of Michael Jackson, it’s time to take a step back. Not all of us are animal people, Paris. Well, except for "humanzees," which are literally animal people. But that's another blog post for another time. Join Us on Facebook and Twitter for even more up to the minute celebrity news and photos! |