A heartbreaking loss. Ashton Kutcher reflected on ex-wife Demi Moore suffering a miscarriage during their relationship — and he didn’t hold his emotions back.
“Losing a kid that you think you’re going to have, and that close to thinking you’re going to have a kid, is really, really painful,” he told Esquire in a profile published online on Tuesday, January 31. “Everyone deals with that in different ways.”
The 44-year-old actor didn’t specify how he worked through the tragedy. “I love kids,” he continued. “I wouldn’t have gotten married to a woman that had three kids if I didn’t love kids. The idea of having another kid would have been incredible. For whatever reason, I had to have that experience.”
Kutcher was married to Moore, 60, from 2005 to 2013. In her bombshell 2019 memoir, Inside Out, the St. Elmo’s Fire star revealed that she and Kutcher had conceived a child. However, she suffered a late-term pregnancy loss at six months.
“It was my fault, I felt for sure: if only I hadn’t opened the door to drinking, I never would have lost the baby. Even worse, I was still smoking when I found out I was pregnant, and it took me a few weeks to quit completely,” she wrote. “I was wracked with guilt and convinced what had happened was my doing.”
Moore was sober for two decades after spending 30 days in a treatment facility to help with her substance abuse issues. She claimed in her memoir that she relapsed during her marriage to Kutcher.
“Ashton was enjoying a glass of good red wine when he said, ‘I don’t know if alcoholism is a real thing — I think it’s all about moderation,'” the G.I. Jane star recalled. “I wanted to be that girl. The girl who could have a glass of wine at dinner, or do a tequila shot at a party. In my mind, Ashton wanted that, too.”
Moore wrote that she nearly drowned in a hot tub while celebrating her 45th birthday in 2007 — and that her then-husband was “furious.” His reaction left her stumped because she believed he “encouraged” her to “go in this direction.”
During a Good Morning America appearance coinciding with Inside Out‘s debut, Moore confessed that she felt “lost” before splitting from Kutcher. “I guess the fundamental question that came forward for me was, ‘How did I get here?'” she said in September 2019.
The Two and a Half Men alum didn’t publicly respond to his ex’s memoir at the time, but he shared his unfiltered reaction with Esquire in Tuesday’s interview. “I was f–king pissed,” he told the outlet, noting that the book’s release led to heightened media scrutiny on him and Mila Kunis. (The That ’70s Show costars tied the knot in 2015 and share children Wyatt, 8, and Dimitri, 6.)
Kutcher added that the “responsibility” of becoming a stepfather to Moore’s daughters — Rumer Willis, Scout Willis and Tallulah Willis, whom she shares with ex-husband Bruce Willis — was “a lot” at first. “I was 26, bearing the responsibility of an 8-year-old, a 10-year-old, and a 12-year-old,” he explained. “That’s how some teen parents must experience their 20s.”
The No Strings Attached actor previously revealed that he’s maintained a bond with his former stepdaughters. “We don’t hang out,” he said on the “WTF With Marc Maron” podcast in February 2020. “I make a really conscious effort to stay in touch with the girls. I love them, and I’m never going to stop loving them, right? And respecting them and honoring them and rooting for them to be successful in whatever they’re pursuing.”
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