“I want to be open and honest. I have struggled the last couple of years,” the “Lights Down Low” songstress, 34, wrote in a lengthy Instagram statement on Thursday, June 23. “It’s up-and-down. There have been really beautiful, amazing moments but also some pretty low lows.”
James Decker, who married former football player Eric Decker in June 2013, revealed in her candid social media post that she had attempted to hide her vulnerabilities out of a sense of “duty” to make people happy.
“I have a very blessed life with healthy children and an incredibly loving rock of a husband,” she wrote on Thursday. “But I have definitely struggled these past couple years. My anxiety has gotten worse [as has] my self-esteem [and] my confidence.”
The Eric & Jessie alum — who shares children Vivianne, 8, Eric, 6, and Forrest, 4, with the Minnesota native — noted her struggles have been getting “a little worse lately” and she “just [breaks] down and [cries]” over body image issues, work-life balance and family drama.
“I’ve had some family issues a couple years ago that I have struggled with tremendously and still to this day make me break down and cry,” James Decker added in her Instagram message. “I would’ve never chosen to deal with that publicly and open that door to such a personal family matter, but it happened, and it still hurts my heart.”
While the Just Jessie author seldom addressed a family falling-out, both she and her mother, Karen Parker, seemed to unfollow John, 27, and his wife, Ally James (née Green). The fitness trainer later admitted last month that he had not spoken to his siblings for several years until their recent reunion.
“With [my sister] Sydney [Bass], [we picked up] right where things left off. You know, we were having fun, joking, being stupid like we always have historically together,” John said during a May appearance on “The Spillover” podcast. “But it wasn’t until a couple of days after that we actually saw Jess. And it was just very cordial for the sake of my mother, I’d say. There was definitely no heart to hearts or anything.”
He added at the time: “[My mom] wanted us to all be together for our birthday and I was really on the fence about going because I just didn’t want to go and then it be awkward — granted, you know, some of us haven’t talked in years. But we decided to do that for her. And it was honestly amazing. It was amazing, not only for us, but for the kids as well, like seeing all the kids play together was … it sounds silly to say, but it felt like a dream come true.”
As the “Almost Over You” musician struggled to deal with her family separation, she continued to face mental health challenges.
“To top it off, I was on such a high from the tour and then got COVID and had to cancel and I feel like I let so many people down that it sent me down a spiral again of depression and made me worried no one would want to come once the tour is back up and running later this summer,” she added on Thursday, referring to her recent concert tour, which has been postponed due to the ongoing health crisis. “I have such a beautiful life and so many blessings, but I still have struggles and need to sit back and work on my mental health.”
She concluded her post: “I think being open and honest will also help me heal through this. I know I’m not alone. And I wanted you to know you’re not alone too. I’m working through it and navigating daily on how to heal.”