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Jimmie Allen Contemplated Suicide After Sexual Assault Scandal: ‘Putting Bullets in My Gun Clip’

Jimmie Allen Reveals He Contemplated Suicide After Sexual Assault Allegations
Jimmie Allen Terry Wyatt/ACMA2021/Getty Images for ACM

Jimmie Allen is getting candid about the aftermath of his sexual assault scandal.

In an interview shared via his YouTube channel on Tuesday, April 23, Allen, 38, sat down with Kathie Lee Gifford to open up about his career and personal life, namely the toll the sexual assault lawsuits made against him took on him.

“I was sitting there and I literally felt like the whole world had just collapsed because the first thing my brain goes to is not the career. Is how I’m gonna provide for my kids,” the country singer shared. While sitting in a hotel room, Allen said he remembered his “life insurance covered suicide.”

He continued: “And I don’t feel that way now, but in that moment when you feel like you have nothing … in the midst of a society where it’s no longer innocent until proven guilty, you know, you’re guilty. She said this, so it must be true.” Allen was accused of sexual assault by his ex-manager in May 2023. One month later, another woman filed a separate sexual assault lawsuit against him.

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“I remember I moved everything over to one phone, all my evidence, pictures, text messages, videos and everything,” Allen told Gifford, 70. “And I remember I was putting bullets in my gun clip.”

Allen said he “stopped” after receiving a text message from a friend which read, “Ending it isn’t the answer,” adding, “I called one of my buddies that lived in lower Delaware. He came up. I gave him my gun. I said, ‘Take it. I don’t need it.’ I remember my mom flew in, and then I started receiving phone calls from different artists checking in on me, saying that they loved me, care about me, they know who I am.”

Having also received messages of support from some of the “biggest actors in Hollywood,” Allen noted he was “hurt” that some people he “expected” to hear from didn’t reach out to him during his dark time.

Jimmie Allen Reveals He Contemplated Suicide After Sexual Assault Allegations 2
Jimmie Allen Denise Truscello/Getty Images for ACM

“It was rough. I went to this retreat place for a little bit. Of course, I got into therapy. And then every single day, I remember battling, ‘Do I want to live? Do I not want to live?’” he shared. “I’m like, ‘Man, my family would have X amount of dollars if I would’ve [taken] care of something.’ But I realized that’s not the way to do it.”

Allen stated that his break from the spotlight was what he “needed,” crediting it for saving his life. “I am healing and growing for me and my children.”

Last May, Allen’s ex-manager accused him of rape and sexually assaulting and harassing her on multiple occasions. Allen denied the allegations, claiming they were in a consensual “sexual relationship.” A second woman claimed in a June 2023 lawsuit that Allen videotaped himself sexually assaulting her in a Las Vegas hotel room one year prior. Allen denied her claims and filed a countersuit, claiming the woman “willing” joined him in his hotel room. (Allen’s former manager dropped her lawsuit against him last month.)

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The alleged relationships occurred during his marriage to his wife, Alexis Gale. The two announced their split in August 2023, revealing at the same time they were expecting baby No. 3. One month after welcoming son Cohen in September 2023, a rep for Allen revealed that the pair had rekindled and were making things work together.

Amid the scandal, Allen was dropped by his record label, BBR Music Group, in June 2023. The musician also revealed last month that he had secretly welcomed twins with another woman before reconciling with Gale, 28.

“I have 6 kids. I love each one of them. I refuse to let anyone make me feel ashamed of any of my children. The only opinion I care about is theirs 💛,” he wrote alongside photos of his kids via his Instagram Story in March, according to Entertainment Tonight.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).

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