In a teaser clip for the upcoming season finale of Total Bellas, Nikki, 35, returned to Napa, California — where she and the Blockers star, 41, were set to wed prior to their split — and it’s safe to say her emotions came flooding to the surface.
“This is the first time I’ve been back in Napa since my big breakup and I just immediately get all the memories,” Nikki tells the camera in the clip released by E! on Thursday, March 21. “But a part of me is like, ‘OK, Nicole. Now you have to make new memories.’”
Toward the end of the nearly two-minute teaser, Nikki sits with her twin sister, Brie Bella, who asks how she’ll feel when Cena eventually moves on with another woman. “No matter what, the next time I see him with someone it’s gonna kill me,” Nikki explains. “I still have a long way to go, but, honestly, I’m ready for a new me. I need it … I just want to move forward.”
Nikki and Cena ended their engagement in April 2018 after six years together. “While this decision was a difficult one, we continue to have a great deal of love and respect for one another,” the former couple said in a joint statement to Us Weekly at the time. “We ask that you respect our privacy during this time in our lives.”
Last month, Nikki opened up to Us about what Cena still means to her despite their breakup.
“We’re good … as good as being apart can be,” she told Us in February. “I’ve always been grateful to have John in my life and to have a man like that. He’s an amazing man. And even through such a hard breakup, he has been truly so amazing.”
The Dancing With the Stars alum — who had a brief fling with her DWTS partner, Artem Chigvintsev — is seemingly enjoying her time as a single lady.
“I’m dating, having fun,” she told Us. “[Artem] is one of the people that I like to have fun with. He’s a good friend.”
The season finale of Total Bellas airs on E! on Sunday, March 24, at 9 p.m. ET.
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