Pamela Anderson shared a video of herself crying on Thursday, September 28, hours after it was confirmed that Hugh Hefner died at age 91.
“Goodbye #Hef. Mr. Hefner I have so many thoughts, I have no brain n right now to edit. I am me because of you. You taught me everything important about freedom and respect. Outside of my family you were the most important person in my life,” she captioned the emotional footage. “You gave me my life… People tell me all the time. That I was your favorite…I’m in such deep shock. But you were old.”
Anderson, 50, went on to write that Hefner’s “back hurt” him “so much” at the time of their last exchange. “Last time I saw you you were using a walker. You didn’t want me to see. You couldn’t hear,” she continued. “You had a piece of paper in your pocket you showed me – with my name Pamela with a heart around it.”
She added: “Now, I’m falling apart. This feeling is so crazy. It’s raining in Paris now. I’m by the window. Everything anyone loves about me is because you understood me. Accepted me and encouraged me to be myself. Love like no one else. Live recklessly with unfiltered abandon. You said the magazine was about a girl like me. That I embody the spirit you fantasized about. I was the one. You said.”
The Baywatch alum landed her first Playboy cover in 1989. Over the years she’s done 14 covers and 15 pictorials for the magazine. In December 2015, she covered the magazine for its final nude issue. (It was covered in the January/February 2016 edition.)
“I got a call from [Hugh’s] attorney who said, ‘We don’t want anybody else. There’s nobody else, could you do the last cover of Playboy?'” she recalled to Entertainment Tonight at the time. Her sons, Brandon and Dylan, encouraged her to do it. “I said, ‘Hef just called, he wants me to do the last cover of Playboy,’ and he goes, ‘Mom you’ve got to do it. We’re older, we’re not embarrassed anymore of you. You know, we think you’re great.'”
Read the rest of Anderson’s tribute to Hefner below:
I can hear you say –
Anderson
Be brave.
There are no rules.
Live your life
I’m proud of you.
There are no mistakes.
And with men –
Enjoy … (Your wonderful laugh)
You have the world by the tail
You are a good girl
And
you are so loved –
You are not crazy.
You are wild and free
Stay strong,
Stay vulnerable. … “It’s movie time”
You loved my boys … You were always, always there for us.
With your love
Your crazy wisdom.
I will miss your everything.
Thank you for making the world a better place.
A freeer and sexier place.
You were a gentleman
charming, elegant, chivalrous
And so much fun.
Goodbye Hef … Your Pamela
