It’s the final countdown! The cast of Bachelor in Paradise was whittled down to just four couples by the end of the Monday, September 5, episode — and drama was at an all-time high. Did Ashley Iaconetti finally lose her virginity? Did Vinny Ventiera and Izzy Goodkind get back together? And more important, who made it to the Fantasy Suites? So many questions, and we have all the answers.
Izzy Tries to Win Back Vinny, Fails
And none for Izzy! Despite the fact that this heartbreaker cozied up to Brett Melnick, he rejected her at the final hour for Lauren Himle. And get this: Izzy’s reaction was to run back into Vinny’s arms! You know, Vinny? The dude she rejected based solely on Brett’s looks? Him. “I made a mistake. I made a huge mistake,” Izzy tearfully said. “I love Vinny, and I didn’t give us that chance to fall in love … I’m in it to Vin it!”
Izzy ended up calling Vinny en route to the airport, and let’s just say it didn’t go as planned. After failing to recognize her voice (literal quote: “Who is this?”), Vinny served some real talk. “Uhh, obviously what happened, it really just f–king blindsided me,” he said. “You wanted to throw it all away to some guy with a f–king lamp. It was pretty shallow. When that happened, the feelings I had just f–king went out the window. I just can’t be with somebody like that. For me, there’s really just no coming back from what happened.”
Welp, guess that’s over. (P.S. Brett broke up with Lauren during the rose ceremony, so that’s also over.)
Wells Ditches 2/3 Girlfriends
Last week, Wells Adams was embroiled in a love square with Ashley, Shushanna Mkrtychyan and Jami Letain. This week, he (a) sent Jami home during the rose ceremony and (b) was completely rejected by Shush. “I don’t want this. I don’t fight for guys,” she said. “Hearing that all the other girls are, like, hunting. I just feel like I’m in the wrong place right now.”
Sure, Wells went after Shushanna, but he didn’t exactly beg her to stay, which naturally caused her to cry. She welled up for Wells, if you will. “A real man will come down and say, ‘You’re not going anywhere. I’m grabbing your hand, you’re gonna go back with me because I want you there,’” Shush wept. “People die, people lose their family and kids, and you’re talking about some bulls–t love right now. It’s so stupid.”
#LetThere #BePeaceOnEarth #AndLetItBegin #WithShushanna
Wait, Did Ashley Just Lose Her Virginity?
In case you hadn’t heard, Ashley is a virgin. And yes, she was super-duper-extra excited about cashing in her V-card with Wells and his “Joe Jonas mouth.” In fact, when asked if she would “sit on his c–k,” Ash enthusiastically said, “Yeah!” Oh, and she said, “If Wells doesn’t [BLEEP] me tonight I’m going to the convent because I’m dying alone.”
Good times! But the thing is, Wells wasn’t sold on the idea of taking Ashley’s virginity. In fact, he said it was against his character to have sex after two dates and broke up with her. 🙁 This means, the final couples in Paradise are Nick Viall and Jen Saviano, Amanda Stanton and Josh Murray, Carly Waddell and Evan Bass, and Lace Morris and Grant Kemp.
Nick and Jen: The Fantasy Suite Date
So, you know how Nick was just announced as The Bachelor? Yeah, kinda awkward for Jen. The poor thing tried her hardest to get Nick on board ship #Jick, but his “walls” were up, Donald Trump–style. Anyway, Tiara the Chicken Enthusiast showed up in Paradise and gave Nick and Jen her date card (side note: she spent the episode eating chicken, which, like, dear god no), but Nick still couldn’t commit.
“It does make me nervous that the last time I expressed any feelings to anyone was in an environment like this, but you’re the only reason I’m still here,” Nick assured Jen, later telling the camera, “I need to figure out if Jen and I have a real shot outside of Paradise. It’s a huge commitment.”
#Jick ended up hitting the fantasy suite together, but Nick’s #walls were still up, and a smitten Jen seemed concerned. “Hopefully [the fantasy suite] gives us the push we need,” she said. “And that I’ll wake up tomorrow having a much better idea of what direction we’re going.” Guess we’ll have to wait and see!
Lace and Grant: The Fantasy Suite Date
Lace and Grant are so in love that they literally hit up some random tattoo parlor and got “Grace” inked on their wrists because — as Lace wisely noted — “life hurts a lot more than tattoos.” Seems like a great idea for a couple that have spent approximately five weeks together!
The good/cute news is that Lace finally told Grant how much she loves him, saying, “You mean a lot to me, and I’m really happy, and it’s just crazy to think about how well we fit together. You have truly made me realize that you’re a man that’s hard to come by and I’m superlucky. You make me love myself and it’s because of you. And I want you to know I love you.” Aww. Let’s all get #Grace tattoos, guys!
Evan and Carly: The Fantasy Suite Date
Fact: Evan and Carly are so in love. Like, say what you will about Bachelor Nation relationships, but these two have a real connection — as we learned from their seminude “sex canvas” painting session, led by a naked old lady with pendulous breasts. It was beautiful and terrifying, much like Evan and Carly’s relationship. And by the way, these two are totally infatuated. See?
Evan: “It’s more than just falling in love with you. I love you. So much.”
Carly: “I love you too. I’ve been wanting to say that to you for so long.”
So, like, two weeks? Also, if you’re wondering whether or not Evan and Carly had sex, this quote should clear things up: “Tonight is the fantasy suite and you know when you love someone, you … how do I phrase that so my dad won’t have a heart attack?”
Josh and Amanda: The Fantasy Suite Date
Not to alarm you, but Josh’s mom is totally you-know-what–blocking his relationship with Amanda. Despite having a great day bonding with some random soccer-playing children, Josh told the camera that his mom is a “huge” part of his life, and implied that her not meeting Amanda could hold him back. Meanwhile, Amanda seemed smitten with Josh — especially when he asked if she could see herself “being a soccer mom.”
“If he doesn’t propose, I would be disappointed,” Amanda confided to the camera. Fingers crossed, again!
Tell Us: Which couples will get engaged during tomorrow’s episode?
Bachelor in Paradise airs on ABC Mondays and Tuesdays at 8 p.m. ET.