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‘The Bachelorette’ Villain Chad Johnson’s 10 Craziest Quotes — Including His ‘Dude-Protein Shake’ Recipe!

The world according to Chad! The Bachelorette season 12 villain Chad Johnson may have a lot to learn when it comes to impressing JoJo Fletcher, or making friends, or deciding whether to punch a metal door. But the lunchmeat enthusiast is definitely the master of the wacky one-liner.

Related: PHOTOS: Biggest Bachelor and Bachelorette Villains

In honor of the 28-year-old luxury real estate agent’s quick Tuesday, August 2, exit from Bachelor in Paradise season 3 for a litany of offenses, we’ve selected our 10 favorite Chad-isms from his brief Bachelorette run. Perhaps we should all pour a glass of milk in his honor.

Related: PHOTOS: 10 Times 'The Bachelor' Made Our Heads Explode!

1. This is not the kind of toast that the other suitors wanted him to make.

Chad [to the other guys in the mansion before the first group date]: “To a beautiful girl, a beautiful life; f–k you guys, I’m gonna make her my wife.”

2. Maybe Jordan isn’t as likable as JoJo’s mom thinks.

Chad [during the ESPN group date]: “Best thing about Jordan is his brother [Aaron Rodgers]. You know what the worst thing about Jordan is? He’s not his brother.”

Related: PHOTOS: 'Bachelor' and 'Bachelorette' Engagement Rings Through the Years

3. But why would any kind of shake have a chance with her?

Chad [to Daniel, by the pool]: “If you’re making a protein shake made of the group of dudes here, and, you know, blended it up … half that dude-protein shake would have zero chance with JoJo.”

4. Not a fan of role-playing.

Chad [after Daniel says to pretend he’s Hitler]: “Let’s not pretend I’m Hitler.”

5. We don’t think anyone knows what you mean, Chad.

Chad [during the two-on-one date]: “Life ain’t all blueberries and paper airplanes, you know what I mean?”

6. The other guys were probably hoping he’d go into hibernation.

Chad [during tension in the mansion]: “In other words, it is not a wise decision to poke the Chad-bear.”

7. Nothing wrong with being skilled at sweeping.

Chad [after Evan got the date rose]: “No girl on planet Earth ever chooses Evan … for anything … other than to come, like, sweep their front yard.”

Chad Johnson visits
Chad Johnson visits “Extra” at Universal Studios Hollywood on August 2, 2016, in Universal City, California.

8. Good news for Alex?

Chad [during a rose ceremony]: “She’s gonna keep Alex around because she doesn’t want America to think she hates short people.”

9. We’d hate to work for the mansion’s pool-cleaning company on that day.

Chad [after Evan tattled on him to Chris Harrison]: “I’m going to cut everyone here’s legs off and arms off, and there’s gonna be torsos, and then I’m going to throw them in the pool.”

10. It does a body good.

Chad [after Alex said he doesn’t drink milk]: “Well, you should. Milk’s delicious.”

Tell Us: Which Chad quote was your favorite? 

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