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Hollywood Kids: Growing Up Too Fast

1265738158_john-mayer-290.jpg

Credit: Courtesy of Playboy

Exclusive: John Mayer: Jessica Simpson Was "Crazy" in Bed

Wednesday – February 10, 2010 – 8:45am

John Mayer is kissing and telling -- again.

UsMagazine.com has an exclusive peek at Playboy's March issue, where the singer, 32, dishes on everything from his past relationships with Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston to his dream mate.

He dubs 29-year-old Simpson (whom he dated from 2006 to 2007) "a drug."

"And drugs aren't good for you if you do lots of them," he says, adding, "Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me."

See Jessica Simpson and other stars rocking hair extensions

"Sexually it was crazy. That's all I'll say," he continues. "It was like napalm, sexual napalm. Did you ever say, 'I want to quit my life and just f*****' snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f*** you, I would start selling all my s*** just to keep f****** you.'"

See Jessica and John in happier times

He didn't share bedroom details about Aniston, who turns 41 Thursday.

But he denied reports that he penned the tune "Heartbreak Warfare" about her. "That woman would never use heartbreak warfare," he tells Playboy. "That woman was the most communicative, sweetest, kindest person."

See Jen and John's most lovey-dovey moments

He also denied that Twitter obsession led to their split last year.

"There was a rumor that I'd been dumped because I was tweeting too much," he says. "That wasn't it, but that was a big difference. The brunt of her success came before TMZ and Twitter. I think she's still hoping it goes back to 1998. She saw my involvement in technology as courting distraction. And I always said, 'These are the new rules.'"

Check out Jen Aniston's on-set PDA!

Oh, and how many women has he bedded since their break-up?

"I'm going to say four or five. No more," he tells Playboy. "But even if I said 12, that's a reasonable number. So is 15. Here's the thing: I get less a** now than I did when I was in a local band. Because now I don't like jumping through hoops."

These days, he says he is hesitant to settle down.

"I hate being the heartbreaker. Hate it," he says. "If I date somebody and it doesn't work out, it's another nightmare for me."

See John Mayer and other guys with bad haircuts

Of course, any interview with Mayer would not be complete without an Us Weekly reference.

Asked about his future, he says, "From now on I’m just going to pretend that people really dig the s*** out of me. I've been trying to prove to people I'm not a douche bag by not dating, by keeping my name out of Us Weekly. That's f***** up, man. I'm not dating. I'm not even f******. So now I'm going to experiment with 'f*** you.' In 2010 my goal is to get more mentions in Us Weekly than ever."

You're off to a good start, John!

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  • March 03, 2010 - 10:41pm Jeanne Says:

    I don't view mayer as an adult male but rather a 12-year-old boy, totally gawkish about sexuality and what to do with it. Let's call it-this dude is emotionally stunted, pathologically self-absorbed and, to me, a total bore. He's more like a laughable cartoonish "rock star" than a fleshed out full-on human being. Mayer your brought this on pal-get a real life some day.

  • March 03, 2010 - 5:27pm LaLa Says:

    Now....How would John Mayer know what it is like to be addicted to crack cocaine???? HMMM...I know I know....Dude is obviously smokin it!

  • March 02, 2010 - 12:53pm Farrel Says:

    can anyone tell me what mustard gas medicine requires Desert Storm

  • February 27, 2010 - 11:29am Brittany Robichaud Says:

    ITS AN INTERVIEW FOR PLAYBOY!! PERFECT! WHAT WAS HE SUPPOSED TO SAY ..."I DON'T HAVE SEX" !!!! AND HE DOESN'T LOOK GRIMY GREASY AND NASTY! HE LOOKS CUTE AND DOABLE! HE'S NOT AS SEXY AS MY MAN BUT HE'S UP THERE ;) NOT LIKING A GUY WITH TATOOS IS A PERSONAL PREFERENCE AND NO ONE CARES ABOUT "YOUR" PREFERENCE IF ITS NEGATIVE! EVERY ONE SHOULD JUST KEEP THEIR NEGATIVITY TO THEM SELVES! MISERABLE ____'S!! HAHA :P

  • February 26, 2010 - 10:49am deedle Says:

    Jess is a sex goddess that is like crack calling him back. Jen is sweet. Hummmm, being 40 never looked so bad.

  • February 24, 2010 - 5:58pm weavermomo Says:

    What is the big deal what he said is a complement, so what!

  • February 19, 2010 - 7:05pm javah Says:

    He's been going off the deep end lately...Too much weed? He needs a CAT scan.

  • February 18, 2010 - 8:21pm IDIOTS Says:

    " Dud er I mean dude just shut the fcuk up.You look grimy,greasy and nasty. You probably don't use good hygiene!!! " OMG. That reminds me of another person... OH YEAH. Robert F@gget-I mean, Pattinson. LOLOLOLOL. I think they're both ugly pieces of SH1T. Just like this F@ggot John Mayer. Oh yeah, guess what?! how awesome woudl it be if John and Rob dated and married and fxcjed? D@mn that'd be soo hawt. LOLO. Both are gay and ugly and greasy. how awesome.

  • February 17, 2010 - 9:39pm whatnext Says:

    Yuck I hate men w/ tattoos. I don't understabd the purpose in wanting permanent ink etched in your skin. In generally, it just looks trashy. Personally, I would never give any guy a chance who has tattoos.

  • February 16, 2010 - 8:39pm IDIOTS Says:

    Idiot "gossipgirl10024 AKA amber" You too are Idiots!

  • February 16, 2010 - 8:37pm IDIOTS Says:

    IDIOTS! Both of them!

  • February 16, 2010 - 3:13pm gossipgirl0024 Says:

    I like him. At least he is honest. He may come off as a dick, because what he says is so raw; but I'd rather have some one speak the truth then to sugar coat it. If I come back as a guy in my next life. I hope to be just like him. Maybe because I already am, but the girl version? And yeah I think his music still rocks!

  • February 16, 2010 - 2:03pm amber Says:

    at least he's honest - I like him.... didn't think to highly of him with everything that was publicized about him but how can we really beleive what these magazines say about his relationships. Look at how many jessica's been in as well as jen aniston (people talk about jessica and how she can't keep a guy but look at aniston - she's in the same boat). I watched him on rob's fantasy factory and he seems like such a fun and nice guy and has great music. I'd hang out with him = )

  • February 16, 2010 - 12:03pm Omar Says:

    he perfers to be with a man..he is gay...there is nothing wrong with being gay, and he is in the closet.

  • February 15, 2010 - 1:36pm John Whatever Says:

    John get over yourself...you ARE NOT HOT..nobody cares what you think...your music sucks...You look stupid...and one piece of advice to remember...if you were really that good, you wouldn't have to constantly tell brag how good you are..people would be saying at themselves...but since you SUCK..and no body cares what you think........

  • February 14, 2010 - 3:23pm whatever Says:

    ok - you can stop talking now John Mayer - gross - I used to like JM's music now I am just completely creeped out

  • February 14, 2010 - 3:08pm inwashdcmdva Says:

    Dud er I mean dude just shut the fcuk up.You look grimy,greasy and nasty. You probably don't use good hygiene!!!

  • February 14, 2010 - 2:38pm Anon Says:

    Re:g Jessica is probably flattered by this instead of insulted. How sad. Poor girl never got over her self esteem issues. ______________________________________ I agree, where is the comment from Joe defending her? Where is Ashlee's at? They're loving this, what better press for her when she does Oprah later this month. John made Jessica look cheap, and devalued their relationship to nothing but sex without substance.

  • February 14, 2010 - 1:30pm Brand Name Says:

    Nice plagiarism. How is this bull exclusive? You stole someones interview and posted it. Thieves.

  • February 14, 2010 - 1:27pm Brand Name Says:

    How the fu

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