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Boris Kodjoe Reveals Secret to His and Nicole Ari Parker’s 21-Year Marriage: ‘Don’t Ever Give Up’ (Exclusive)

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Dia Dipasupil/FilmMagic

Boris Kodjoe and Nicole Ari Parker make one hot couple — and after over two decades of marriage, it seems like they’ve got the whole “for better or worse” thing figured out.

They recently celebrated 21 years of marriage — “which is 70 years in Hollywood,” Kodjoe, 53, jokes while speaking exclusively to Us — and the secret to their long-lasting love goes beyond just staying put.

“My No. 1 answer is don’t ever give up, because people are focused on the good in the ‘for good and bad,’ and they’re rarely even considering the bad,” the actor reveals exclusively in the latest issue of Us Weekly, on newsstands now. “The bad will undoubtedly come, 100 percent, just like the good.”

He continued: “So the question is: What do you do when it happens? Do you turn your back? Do you run for the hills or do you stick it out? Do you fight for your relationship? Do you get to know each other even better throughout that process?”

 

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Boris Kodjoe and Nicole Ari Parker with their children, Sophie and Nicolas, at the season 3 premiere of ‘And Just Like That’ in 2025 Kristina Bumphrey/Variety via Getty Images

The couple — who share daughter Sophie, 21, and son Nicolas, 19 — also prioritize trust and communication, which, Kodjoe quipped, “comes with the program.” But they make room for adventure, too. “I think it’s very important to get out there and do different things,” Kodjoe added. “Embracing every part of the journey is important, too.”

Kodjoe and the And Just Like That alum jetted off to Beaches Turks & Caicos the same week as their 21st wedding anniversary to celebrate the opening of Treasure Beach Village at the resort on May 16, which is fitting, since the Station 19 actor told Us “vacations have always been a big part of our relationship, including the kids.”

The couple brought along daughter Sophie for their Caribbean getaway, which included soaking in the sun, water sports and enjoying the “culinary diversity” of the island.

“It’s super important because you get to leave your four walls and be in another environment and talk about different things,” Kodjoe told Us of the importance of traveling for the maintenance of a relationship. “We’ve always done that.”

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Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe with daughter Sophie at Beaches Turks & Caicos John Parra/Getty Images for Beaches Resorts

The Hollywood couple first met on the set of Soul Food in the early 2000s before sparking a romance and saying “I do” in Kodjoe’s hometown of Gundelfingen, Germany, in 2005. They welcomed daughter Sophie in 2005, and son Nicolas one year later.

“He’s pretty breathtaking, gorgeous, but I was a bit of a snob,” Parker recalled to Us of her first impression of her husband for her cover story last year. “One night we were doing a scene, and his character was supposed to sexily lean me against a wall and kiss me. He was so nervous, adorable and shy. I took him behind the set, put my hands on his face and kissed him. I said, ‘That is how you kiss!’ And then I fell in love.”

Parker has a similar mindset to Kodjoe when it comes to long-lasting love.

“It gets hard, you get in ruts, you get sick of each other, but you find a way,” she told Us. “So far, so good.”

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