Already have an account?
Get back to the

Chris Brown Details Abusive Relationship With Rihanna: ‘What the F—k Are We Doing?’

Chris Brown
Chris Brown

Chris Brown is telling his side of the story about the abuse between himself and ex-girlfriend Rihanna during their relationship in his documentary Chris Brown: Welcome to My Life. 

In a clip posted on a fan account’s Facebook page on Monday, August 14, Brown discusses falling in love with the pop star when they were both teenagers, and noted that the two got serious very quickly. Nearly eight months into their romance, Brown decided to tell Rihanna about a woman he had slept with prior to their relationship, a claim he had previously denied to the Barbados native.

“My trust totally was lost with her, she hated me after that. I tried everything, she didn’t care. She just didn’t trust me after that,” Brown recalls. “From there, it just went downhill because there were too many verbal fights, physical fights as well. Mutual sides. It is the first time I get to say anything. We would fight each other. She would hit me, I would hit her and it never was OK.”

Related: Rihanna & Chris: Through the Years

Brown, 28, adds that the couple did attempt to stop their fighting. “There was always a point where we’d talk about it like, ‘What the f—k are we doing?’” he says. “Like, ‘I don’t like you slapping me.’ If I go on stage I got a scratch on my face and I gotta explain it like, ‘Oh, no I fell.’ If you got a scar or a bruise you gotta put makeup on. I’m not ever trying to put my hands on any female.” 

Chris Brown and Rihanna attend the 55th Annual GRAMMY Awards at STAPLES Center on February 10, 2013 in Los Angeles, California.
Chris Brown and Rihanna attend the 55th Annual GRAMMY Awards at STAPLES Center on February 10, 2013 in Los Angeles, California. Christopher Polk/Getty Images for NARAS

He adds: “I felt like a f—king monster.”

As previously reported, Brown turned himself in after physically assaulting Rihanna, 29, after Clive Davis’ Grammy event in February 2009. This incident, Brown says, was triggered by the unidentified woman that he previously had sex with approaching the couple at the event. “The ceremony’s about to start, she’s just crying,” he said, adding that he insisted he didn’t know the woman would be there. “She got over it. She started drinking a little bit, we both was drinking a little bit. We was tipsy, laughing and then we left.”

In the car after the event, Rihanna saw a text message from the woman, which led her to believe that Brown knew she would be there, the rapper explains. “She starts going off, she throws the phone…’I hate you,’” he recalls. “She hits me a couple more times.”

Things quickly took a turn, recalls Brown, who was driving the car. “I remember she tried to kick me, but then I really hit her, with a closed fist, I punched her. I busted her lip,” he says. “When I saw it, I was in shock. I was like, ‘F—k’ why the hell did I hit her? From there she just spit in my face, spit blood in my face and it enraged me even more.”

Brown says he pulled over the car in order to try and resolve their fight. “She takes the keys out of the car and fakes it like she throws them out of the window,” he says in the clip. “I get out the car and I’m looking for the keys and somebody yelled and she yells out her door, ‘Help, he’s trying to kill me.'”

Chris Brown: Welcome to My Life was released on June 8, 2017 and was released worldwide on VOD, Blu-Ray and DVD on August 8, 2017. 

In this article