Ashton Kutcher knows the secret to happiness, and it's Demi Moore.
"The real trick is putting yourself around people you admire," he says in the latest issue of Parade magazine (on newsstands Sunday). "That's why I married my wife. I locked in the brightest light in the room."
His nearly four-year marriage to the 46-year-old actress is as strong as ever, thanks to a pact they made when they first wed.
"My wife and I have an agreement in our marriage, and part of that contract is that we are going to shine our lights on each other," he says. "My relationship with Demi is so solid, thank God, and we're so communicative about the way that we're feeling, that we don't allow space to come between us. I definitely believe that if you stop working at relationships, they go away."
"I bought my whole family these fake watches and fake Versace pants and fake anything I could find, like fake Calvin Klein T-shirts, so I could take them home and show them how well I was doing even though I didn't have a place to live."
Prior to meeting Moore, he even traded up for a good night's sleep.
"It was always a good thing when you hooked up with a girl and got to sleep someplace nice for the night," he says. "I wasn't there to stay, but if you did hit it off with a girl, her place was always nicer than yours."
Still, Kutcher admits there's a downside to living the Hollywood life.
"Of course there is a price," he says. "I've only been back home to Iowa once in the last year and a half to see my family. I go and shoot a film and spend months away from my wife and my girls [Rumer, 20, Scout, 17, and Tallulah, 15]. And that's a price to pay. I also don't get to see my friends very often. You can't complain when you're so blessed. I get so many things that the notion of me complaining is obscene. It's absurd. It's ridiculous."
The former That '70s Show actor and Punk'd host stresses that he's the same goofball he's always been.
"I'm still looking for trouble. I'm still disruptive," he tells Parade. "I'm still doing some things that other people don't like."
He adds, beaming: "I hear, 'You're a moron,' about once a day from someone in a genuine way -- not as a joke."