Charlie Sheen's Top 10 Craziest Quotes
Credit: Isaac Brekken/WireImage.com
Charlie Sheen is on a roll! After CBS halted production of Two and a Half Men February 24, the 45-year-old "winning" actor has been candid about everything from his sobriety to his "Adonis" DNA. Read on:
01. On Why He'll Never Touch Drugs Again
"I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people, people who aren't special, people who don't have tiger blood and Adonis DNA."
PHOTOS: Charlie's most controversial moments
02. Addressing Rumors He's Bipolar
"I'm bi-winning. I win here and I win there. Now what? If I'm bipolar, aren't there moments where a guy like crashes in the corner like, 'Oh my God, it's all my mom's fault!' Shut up! Shut up! Stop! Move forward."
03. On Plans to Sue CBS for Shutting Down His Show
"They're trying to destroy my family, so I take great umbrage with that. And defeat is not an option. They picked a fight with a warlock."
04. On Why He Deserves a $3 Million Paycheck for Two and a Half Men
"I'm tired of pretending I'm not special. I'm tired of pretending I'm not a total bitchin' rock star from Mars. People can't figure me out. They can't process me. I don't expect them to. You can't process me with a normal brain."
05. On Why He's a "Winner"
"I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time -- and this includes naps -- I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground."
PHOTOS: Spectacular celebrity meltdowns
06. Addressing His Substance Abuse Issues
"I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available because if you try it once you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body. It's too much."
07. Regarding Comments Made By Two and a Half Men Creator Chuck Lorre
"I fire back once and this contaminated little maggot can't handle my power and can't handle the truth. I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words -- imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists."
08. On His Estranged Wife Brooke Muller's Restraining Order
"Great. I was already planning on staying 100 parsecs away from her." (A parsec is a unit of length equalling 3.26 light-years.)
PHOTOS: Hollywood families torn apart
09. On His Porn Star "Family"
"Let me say this about the Goddesses, I don't think the term is good enough, but when you're bound by these terrestrial descriptions, you must use the best term available. So if you think about it, dude, I'm 0-for-3 in marriage, but like in baseball, the scoreboard doesn't lie. Never has. So what we all have is a marriage of the hearts. And to sully, contaminate, or radically disrespect this unit with a shameful contract is something I'll leave to the amateurs and bible grippers."
10. On the Possibility of Relapsing
"No. Not going to. Period. The end. I blinked and I cured my brain. Can't is the cancer of happen."
Tell Us What You Think
23Charlie Sheen will forever go down as a legend in my mind. not saying i think everything he's doing is right, but man even without a tv show he sure is entertaining.
sorry for all the haters, but i agree with charlie on most of his points. some people are just better that others at everything always. i bet his life has been more fulfilling than, most normal humans. personally i hate most of the idiots that i meet, so i see where he is coming from. Stop hating what you dont understand, only causes more problems in the world.
Psychology analysises of Charlie Sheen http://psychology-advice.net/tag/charlie-sheen
THe Goddesses Lol!!
Seems to me like Charlie is playing to much World of Warcraft.
@ Kenneth and Sean, your both wrong. A parsec is the distance from the Sun to an astronomical object which has a parallax angle of one arcsecond. And poor Charlie is lost in space parsecs away from us "normal" earthlings.
I'm not sure if he's going to win this time.
After reading these comments--I'm glad that instead of being mean spirited most realize he's a train wreck and needs some help. I hope he gets it soon but what can you do with a rich, famous, grown man?? There's only so much his family/friends can do...
After watching his 20/20 interview, I have decided that Charlie is completely off his rocker. This man needs help soon or he will be dead in the next couple of months.
I would write what a complete idiot this guy is but his fire breathing fists and blinking mind healing kinda frighten me.
P.S. Charlie Sheen is a drug-addled, idiotic, whacked-out nutbar, whose children have been rightfully taken from him and whose career is aimed squarely for some vague reality show purgatory despite his "fire-breathing fists" and his being a "warlock".
Actually: a parsec (portmanteau of parallax second) is a measure of the distance between the sun and it's nearest stellar neighbor, Alpha Centauri, approx. 3.26 light years. What Sean Katz referenced was an Astronomical Unit, the distance between the Earth and the Sun, which is 93 million miles.
I am charlie sheen reborn from his ashes of the future
as a science nerd, I take umbrage with #8. A parsec is actually a real astronomical unit of measure, not exclusively from Star Wars (they referenced it in episode four, albeit it at a correct context). A parsec is actually the distance between the sun and the earth, which is approximately 8 light minutes, not 3.26 light years. Fail.
Pretty soon we'll be reading his obituary.
Really u want a raise for what so u can spend it on drugs???? great role models for your boys 2 porn stars REALLY?????
legend
Charlie really needs some serious help!!! I hope he gets it!!!
losing? he's far gone! way way gone. cocaine is hell of a drug... and that's what you;re hearing in this delusional loser of a man. he can go do whatever the hell he wants to do as far as i'm concerned. idiot..
He is not all there......