Last week on The Bachelorette, JoJo Fletcher rejected Chad after the most deranged two-on-one date in history. But then he was like "LOL, hi!" and showed up at Bachelor Mansion to drag his fingernails down the front door. You know what that means: Chad made his triumphant return during the Monday, June 20, episode, and it was iconic. Meanwhile, JoJo went on a group date with Jordan (plus some random seals who just weren't prepared for their moment in the spotlight), and she dealt with a dramatic tabloid interview from her ex. And yes, his name is also Chad because LOLOLOLOLOL.
Bye Forever, Chad
Much like an evil weed, Chad refuses to leave the garden that is JoJo's heart. This totally stable and not-at-all-crazy reject interrupted his former roomies (after they ceremoniously spread the ashes of his protein shakes), and was on a mission to throw shade. Not only did he tell Jordan "you don't have half a brain," he refused to buy Evan the Erectile Dysfunction Specialist a new shirt. Basically, Chad was the worst — but to be fair, we have to assume he was jacked up on deli meat. Lord knows what all that ham does to a man's brain.
Rose Ceremony #1
There were not one, but two, Rose Ceremonies this week — and where there's a Rose Ceremony, there's a super-awkward cocktail hour. Tension was at an all-time high thanks to JoJo's men fighting for her time, and let's just say everyone was highly disturbed by Robby kissing her in public. How dare you, sir?
Anyway, JoJo had an intimate conversation with Luke in which he announced, "I want you to know that I'm falling for you," and also enjoyed a make out session with Jordan and his pompadour. However, hearts were crushed on this fated night — and by that, we mean JoJo said farewell to James F. and Daniel, the latter saying, "She's obviously going for personality, and obviously my personality is s--t." #PrayForDaniel #CanadaStrong
Is Jordan a Lying Cheater Who Will Break JoJo's Heart? A Discussion
Welcome to Punta Del Este, Uruguay! A lovely town that JoJo's gents have literally never heard of! Jordan was blessed with the first date of the trip, and he and JoJo essentially spent their time kissing on a boat and frolicking with some random seals who were like, "UGH we are not being paid enough for this." But is Jordan here for the right reasons? Unclear, because *apparently* JoJo befriended one of his ex-girlfriends and has some concerns.
You see, Jordan's ex seems to think he "wasn't the best boyfriend." And his reaction? To be all, "That's, uh, interesting," and then explain that while he never cheated on his ex, he did flirt with other women. But guys, it was just because of his complicated football feelings, ok? The balls made him do it! "I have nothing to hide," Jordan told JoJo. "I know what kinda man I am now, and I know I'm not a cheater."
JoJo gave Jordan a rose, so guess she's chill with his response.
JoJo's Past Comes Back to Haunt Her
Even though the cast of Bachelorette definitely are not allowed to read magazines, the boys got their hands on an interview (well played, Chris Harrison) with JoJo's ex, Chad (not to be confused with our Chad, blessed be his name). This thirsty troublemaker claimed that he and JoJo were sneaking around during The Bachelor, and also said that she was on The Bachelorette "for publicity reasons."
This shocking revelation led JoJo's men to gather their collective brain cells and freak out over their shared wife's real intentions, while she was busy sitting through the following interview:
JoJo: "I just feel so happy, I don't think anything could take away this feeling!"
Producer: *hands over Chad's interview*
JoJo: "Ew, are you kidding me? Why are you showing me this? … He's just a s--tty human being."
Poor JoJo had a mild meltdown over Chad (during which she said "that pisses me the f--k off," and "I hate him"), but eventually put her boyfriends' hive mind at ease, saying, "I don't ever want a single one of you guys to think I'm faking this." KK, cool.
JoJo Takes to the Dunes
JoJo's group date basically involved everyone face-planting down a sand dune before Mother Nature was like "Nope, bye," and started bucketing rain. But the real fun started when JoJo gave her rose to Derek, and everyone just lost it. Apparently, JoJo's guys thought Derek's blatant insecurity earned him the rose, and Alex just could not. "I don't like the guy," Alex said. "He's a very calculated person. A jealous person. And he's giving off this vibe of insecurity, and I hate it." Oh, Alex also added, "He's an insecure little bitch," just in case you were unclear about his feelings.
Later at the Rose Ceremony cocktail hour (which JoJo flaked on, BTW), Derek decided to confront Robby, Chase, Alex and Jordan about ganging up on him, but they reacted … shall we say, terribly? Poor Derek was accused of being "sensitive" and engaging in "petty bullshit," while Alex accused him of trying to distract everyone from JoJo. It's like, LEAVE DEREK ALONE, GUYS.
Robby Is a Man in Love
Apparently, Robby's in love with JoJo, which seems totally normal after approximately zero real dates. This dude announced his feelings following a lovely day with JoJo spent mingling amongst the locals / hurling themselves into choppy bodies of water, and the moment was all kinds of cute. You know, other than the fact that JoJo's response was "thank you."
Robby told JoJo that he reevaluated life after a close friend died in a texting-and-driving accident, causing him to break up with his girlfriend and and join The Bachelorette. "I just wanted to let you know that I've fallen in love with you, JoJo," he said. "I have."
While JoJo didn't drop the L-word back, she did tell cameras she can "see [herself] falling in love with him," and gave Robby a rose. Could he be the one? Meh, probably not. But maybe!
Rose Ceremony #2
You guys, please raise your hands to the sky and pray to the Bachelorette gods, because Evan the Erectile Dysfunction Specialist was eliminated, and we don't know what's going to happen to him out there. How many bloody noses can one guy get, sob?! Anyway, bye forever, Evan, and also Vinny and Grant, since apparently JoJo shows no mercy.
Tell Us: Do you think JoJo is on The Bachelorette for the right reasons?
The Bachelorette airs on ABC Mondays at 8 p.m. ET.
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