Selena Gomez: Justin Bieber Was “My First Love,” I’m “Stoked” to Have Emotional “Scars” and “Bruises”

Selena Gomez
Selena Gomez said her ex Justin Bieber was her "first love" in the upcoming issue of V magazine; plus, see more of her revealing topless mag photos! Inez & Vinoodh

Selena Gomez is starting 2015 off on a positive note. The former Disney star-turned pop star has headed back into the studio, appeared to say goodbye to Justin Bieber for good, and moved on to a rumored new beau, DJ Zedd. The “Heart Wants What It Wants” entertainer seemingly reminisced about her on-and-off relationship with Bieber in the upcoming issue of V magazine and more while being interviewed by none other than her former Spring Breakers costar, James Franco.

“I was 18 years old, and it was my first love. The older I get, I’m guarding certain things more. After being put through the scrutiny, I understand what it is,” Gomez, 22, explains to the Interview star. “When you’re young and you’re being told so many different things…it almost felt like all we had was each other, like the world was against us, in a way. It was really weird but it was incredible. I would never take it back in a million years. You live and you learn, you know?”

Selena Gomez V Magazine 1
Selena Gomez in V magazine Inez & Vinoodh

Gomez began dating the “Boyfriend” singer in 2010, but has appeared to have finally turned the page with Zedd in recent months. Though she hints that she’s not in a place for a new BF just yet (“I think the next time will be much different…which will definitely not be any time soon”), the star does seem to be in a happier place these days.

“I think this year is going to be incredible, I feel the best I’ve ever felt in my life, but I mean, your 20s, good God,” she tells the mag. “I’m super stoked that I’ve got some bumps on me, some scars, some bruises. I actually really love that. And I don’t mean that in a morbid way.”

Selena Gomez V Magazine 2
Selena Gomez in V magazine Inez & Vinoodh

Gomez and Bieber, 20, had one of their many splits in January 2013. One year later, the Texas native secretly entered rehab for two weeks. Her rep told Us it was “not for substance abuse,” as a source added it was to “get herself together” at the time.

“It was great to experience really beautiful things, and then [to] have the growing pains, in every possible manner, in every relationship. It was family, it was business, it was buying my first home, moving out of my parents’ house. There was so much going on,” Gomez explains of her darker days. “You can’t help but have some troubles here and there. I don’t think it’s a smooth process for anyone, and it definitely wasn’t for me.”

Selena Gomez V Magazine Cover
Selena Gomez goes topless on the cover of V magazine Inez & Vinoodh

So, how did she handle it all? She didn’t leave her house. “It just causes a lot of anxiety,” she says of being in the spotlight all of the time. “There were a few months where I was a little depressed, where I wouldn’t leave as much. I love my home, it’s a really nice house and it’s the first home I’ve owned, so I have a music room and I have a nice kitchen and I kind of just stayed put for a while.”

“I think I drove myself crazy for a little bit,” she adds. “My response was to stay in, which sucked. That’s what I was trying to fix this past year, I’m finally getting a little bit more comfortable. It’s a process.”

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