American Horror Story: Roanoke’s Five Biggest WTF Moments (Lady Gaga’s Forest Sex!)

After unveiling a twist on the usual format in its first two episodes, American Horror Story: Roanoke pivoted again in its Wednesday, September 28, episode. New characters arrived on the scene, Lady Gaga made her long-awaited first appearance, and fans finally got a glimpse behind the scenes of the show-within-a-show that’s left us wondering what else AHS has up its sleeve. But most importantly, the FX series reminded us that while “Freak Show” may not be the theme this season, they are still plenty of times it strays beyond horror into sheer WTF territory.

Below, we’ve rounded up the top five moments that made us go hmmmm.

House of flies

In the course of searching for Flora (Saniyya Sidney), Shelby (Lily Rabe), Matt (Cuba Gooding Jr.) and Lee (Adina Porter) turned up something else entirely: a decaying farm covered in dismembered pig parts, and a pair of hillbilly wild-boys suckling their lunch from a swine’s teat. Gross! And yet, this was *not* the weirdest act of intimacy to be depicted in this week’s episode.

Jiminy Cricket

A new character came on the scene this week in the form of Cricket, a Louisiana psychic who talks like Zelda Rubinstein and looks like a hobbit funeral director. It remains to be seen what Cricket’s role will be in the docuseries; in the meantime, we’re obsessed with the urgent mystery of his astronomically bad haircut.

The fourth wall breaks

If you’d been wondering whether we’d ever get to see the machinery of the Dateline-esque My Roanoke Nightmare docuseries at the heart of this season, here’s your answer! In an “unscripted” moment, Lee demanded the cameras be cut off, leading to a brief surprise glimpse of her interviewers. Keeping in mind that Ryan Murphy has been teasing a big twist still to come, we’re guessing this won’t be the last we see of the men behind the curtain.

Eat your heart out

Where has Lady Gaga been so far this season? Running around the forest in a crazy-lady wig and securing a beating beast’s heart to feed to Kathy Bates, apparently! The star’s first moment on AHS: Roanoke was just as creepy as expected, albeit nowhere near as graphic as her season-opening naked blood orgy on “Hotel.”

“I certainly have no memory of what Shelby said she saw when she found me.”

It wouldn’t be American Horror Story without a truly unsettling sex scene, hence this money shot: Matt having sweaty forest-fugue sex with a matted-looking Lady Gaga, all while two hillbilly creepers watched and masturbated. The rest of us, however, will probably want to deal with that image by pouring maximum-strength bleach all over our televisions and eyeballs and brains.

Tell Us: How does Lady Gaga’s role compare to last season’s?

American Horror Story: Roanoke airs on FX Wednesdays at 10 p.m. ET. 

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