Eric Dane looked back on how his battle with addiction affected his Grey’s Anatomy tenure in his posthumously-released memoir.
“My body goes to s***. I drop to 170 [pounds], my face caves in, my eyes cloud, I look gaunt,” Dane recalled of his 2008 relapse in his My Book of Days: A Memoir in Moments, excerpted by People on Sunday, October 18. “I look like a drug addict. You can tell. I can tell. My attitude on set changes.”
Dane joined Grey’s Anatomy during season 2, playing plastic surgeon Dr. Mark Sloan. In between seasons of the hit medical drama, Dane entered treatment five times throughout his onscreen run.
“Over time, I come out improved. I do my best. I manage my addictions, I stay sober on set,” he wrote in the book passage. “Things have changed. Look at me. Physically, I appear healthy. But mentally, I’m on my way out. I love Mark Sloan, but I need to quit him. I feel as if I’ve squeezed every ounce of life out of that character, have investigated and mined every nuance of his being.”
He continued, “I’ve spent eight years living in his skin, and my time has come. I’ve had enough. But I don’t know how to get off that train.”
By the end of 2012’s season 8, Grey’s creator Shonda Rhimes privately informed the actor that his character would not return for season 9. His character, along with love interest Lexie Grey (Chyler Leigh) were both killed off in a fatal plane crash. (Dane and Leigh, 44, reprised their roles in a season 17 dream sequence, which aired in 2021.)
“My Grey’s Anatomy ending does come, but not because of my addiction, although it’s safe to say my addiction didn’t help. The reason comes down to money,” he alleged. “Despite Mark Sloan’s popularity, I have become too expensive. I have become expendable.”
Dane’s memoir, which will also feature firsthand details of his ALS battle, will be published nearly nine months after his death at the age of 53.
“With heavy hearts, we share that Dane passed on Thursday afternoon following a courageous battle with ALS,” the actor’s family said in a February statement shared with Us. “He spent his final days surrounded by dear friends, his devoted wife and his two beautiful daughters, Billie and Georgia, who were the center of his world.”
The obituary continued, “Throughout his journey with ALS, Eric became a passionate advocate for awareness and research, determined to make a difference for others facing the same fight. He will be deeply missed and lovingly remembered always. Eric adored his fans and is forever grateful for the outpouring of love and support he’s received. The family has asked for privacy as they navigate this impossible time.”
Dane is survived by his two daughters, Billie and Georgia, whom he shared with Rebecca Gayheart.
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
My Book of Days: A Memoir in Moments will be released Tuesday, November 3.
