Tila Tequila: I "Scream Out at Night" for Casey Johnson

Celebrity News Jan. 14, 2010 AT 11:11AM
Tila Tequila: I "Scream Out at Night" for Casey Johnson

Tila Tequila is losing sleep over the death of her fiancee Casey Johnson.

"I would like to see her right now. Right now. But if that's not going to happen, then I hope she hears me when I scream out for her at night when I can't sleep," Tequila, 28, tells Chaunce Hayden in Steppin' Out magazine.

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"The bed is so empty without my wife and our dogs," Tequila goes on.

Tequila says she and Johnson, 30, who was found dead on Jan. 4, "were and still are very much in love. It wasn't love like either of us had ever experienced before. That is why we got engaged so fast.

"We wanted to hurry up and start the next chapter of our lives together.  Just me, her, Ava, our 3 dogs, and another little one on the way," adds Tequila, who has been hinting she's pregnant on Twitter. (She also said Wednesday that she’s going to seek custody of Casey's adopted daughter, Ava.)

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Tequila says she and Johnson "became domesticated" and "were so happy happy that we never left the bedroom. That was our favorite hang out spot. My bedroom and my Jacuzzi."

"We were everything that both of us ever needed. Each other," she goes on.

Tequila says she's not giving back the 17-carat engagement ring Johnson gave her.

"I have it and will never let anyone take it away from me. That is something my wife gave to me to promise our courtship together for the rest of our lives," she says. "I was so happy.  The ring is absolutely real."

She also claims that she was bumped from appearing on Larry King Live because the Johnson family "threatened to sue Larry King if I'm on his show."

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