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Beyonce Wants to Bring Veganism to the Tired, Huddled Masses

Beyonce Knowles
Beyonce has launched a new vegan meal delivery service

Back in the winter of 2013, Beyoncé had a brief, yet life-changing, fling with veganism. She's now doing with veganism what Beyoncé does best: monetizing it. Bey has just announced a partnership with exercise physiologist Marco Borges (who is also her personal trainer) launching the "22 Days Nutrition plant-based home delivery meal service."

Would you like to look like Beyoncé? Well sorry, but that's never going to happen. But if you like to eat the unidentifiable slop Beyoncé eats in order to look like Beyoncé, you're in luck.

For between $9.76 and $16.50 a meal, you can have week's worth of meals delivered to your home (you can choose between one and three meals per day) for 22 days straight. According to a press release about the launch of the service, "[t]he program's philosophy is based on the concept that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit and on the 22nd day you are well on your way to forming new habits." This might be true for most of us, but Beyoncé has never had a bad habit to break. Her mind is like a fortified castle, her will stronger than a bear trap.

Bey also provides this quote:

"If I can do it, anyone can."

Um. The list of things Beyoncé can do that we mortals cannot could fill an entire encyclopedia. The list of things Beyoncé can do that we mortals cannot could fill a stadium, and then Beyoncé would dazzle that full house with a 150-minute concert spectacle.

For those who'd like to try, yet ultimately fail, to be Beyoncé, each meal is 100 percent plant-based, and low in fat, sugar, and salt. You can order them here. It's not clear if cigars on ice are part of the approved meal plan.

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