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Conan: “I May Soon Be Available for Children’s Parties!”

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When life gives him lemons, Conan O'Brien makes funnies!

On Tuesday, hours after the comic threatened to quit The Tonight Show if it is moved to 12:05 p.m. (to accommodate the proposed new time slot for The Jay Leno Show), O'Brien joked about his imbroglio with NBC. As with his earlier statement, O'Brien didn't pull any punches.

"Hello, my name is Conan O'Brien," he began, "and I may soon be available for children's parties."

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"Welcome to NBC. Where our new slogan is, 'No longer just screwing up prime-time,'" he quipped, in a nod to his network's struggle to set up a strong programming lineup.

"When I was a little boy, I remember watching The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson and thinking, 'Someday, I'm going to host that show for 7 months.'"

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(O'Brien famously took over The Tonight Show from Leno in fall 2009; Leno inherited the franchise from the late Johnny Carson.)

"NBC says they're planning to have the late night situation worked out before the Winter Olympics start," O'Brien explained. "And trust me, when NBC says something — you can take that to the bank!"

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The redhead then mentioned a hot-button issue currently making waves in Washington, D.C.: "Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is still under fire for remarks he made about President Obama's 'blackness.' Sources say Reid could face Congressional censure, or even worse, be promised the The Tonight Show at 11:30."

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