After last week’s Real Housewives of New York City champagne-and-caviar celebration (where LuAnn de Lesseps threatened to smash Ramona Singer‘s face in the caviar) we would have understood if Dorinda Medley decided to retract her (uber-generous) offer to continue her 50th birthday celebration by hosting a luxurious dinner party at her home in the Berkshires—but the newbie Housewife was a trooper and the retreat at her country estate went on as planned.
In a weird twist, Ramona and LuAnn rode up together, though LuAnn readily admitted to the camera that wasn’t her idea of a good time. Still, they seemed to be civil, if not friendly, and made the trip without incident. Upon arriving at the host/birthday girl’s expansive home, they were joined by Heather Thomson, Kristen Taekman, and Carole Radziwill. Drinks magically materialized and everything was going smoothly, until about five minutes later, when it wasn’t.
Kristen Tells Dorinda John Is Too “Touchy-Feely”
Once they all settled in, Ramona wasted no time commiserating with Kristen about Dorinda’s boyfriend John. Ramona kicked off the convo by recounting what LuAnn said to her, which, in a nutshell, was that she thinks John is too flirty.
“I mean, I have to say, remember when she had us all for drinks by the U.N.? He was a little flirty,” Kristen jumped in. “I was uncomfortable that night. I walked away. It’s like, my husband’s watching. It’s weird.” Just as she was (wisely) advising Ramona to either settle her beef with the Countess privately or let it go, however, Dorinda walked in. Talk about bad timing.
But seemingly bolstered by Ramona’s presence, Kristen didn’t back down. “With me, he was touchy-feely,” Kristen told the birthday girl. (Cut to: Ramona talking to the camera later: “Kristen you are absolutely dumb to tell Dorinda that John is too touchy! I thought you had a brain or two.”) For her part, Dorinda defended her man.
“You were with him as well, Kristen. You were right there, shimmying with him,” Dorinda chided. “You’re a married woman. Your husband was there. You’re a mother.” It seemed that the more Dorinda argued, the more upset she got. “I think it’s inappropriate to do that in front of your husband. I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed for you and I was embarrassed for myself. You made me look like an ass. Don’t do that s—. I didn’t want to say anything, but it wasn’t appropriate.”
Kristen continued to insist that she “walked away,” prompting Dorinda to snap at her: “Don’t play coquettish with me!” The brawl escalated until Dorinda broke down in tears over her deceased husband and how she had wanted to be married to him for the next thirty years. Apparently touched by her outpouring of emotion, the two other women backed down, giving Dorinda the final word on John. “He sincerely loves me and I sincerely love him and I’ll defend him to the end.”
Trouble Brews Between Heather and Bethenny
Heather was a little prickly this episode. When, during a girls’ night out dinner, Ramona announced that she had changed her mind about the Berkshires, Heather couldn’t help herself. “I’m glad you finally have an appreciation for the Berkshires, Ramona,” she quipped. “I’m sorry I didn’t give you the red carpet you’re receiving on this trip.” For whatever reason, Ramona opted not to take that bait and the conversation moved along to Bethenny Frankel.
Carole and LuAnn defended the Skinnygirl mogul, arguing that she’s doing her best to balance all of her commitments and current struggles. But Heather wasn’t buying it.
“I think this crowd is scared of Bethenny,” Heather snapped. “I don’t know why they cut her so much slack.” She then went on to make some idiotic comparison between the trauma of Bethenny’s childhood in an abusive home (born to a mother who openly didn’t want her, as we learned last week) to the trauma she recently suffered at losing her nanny of nine years. “Not a good comparison,” LuAnn said to the camera later. You can say that again.
Dorinda Draws the Line
Later on, the stragglers—Sonja Morgan, Dorinda’s boyfriend John, Ramona’s business partner (and maybe date) Peter, and Heather and Kristen’s husbands—show up at the house. Sonja prances around in front of John in a silk pajama set, prompting Dorinda to tell the camera the line that John can’t cross: “Don’t go near those breasts! Don’t you dare get near her vagina!” So now we know what the rules are, but it’s unclear whether he does.
Bethenny Shows Up, Just in Time for the Main Event
Once Sonja changed out of her sexy jammies, everyone headed down to dinner—and that’s when Bethenny showed up. “I don’t like surprises, but I don’t mind giving them,” she laughed to the camera. Everyone seemed excited to see the returning housewife, except Heather, who looked like she was going to vomit. (For the record, she didn’t.)
When Bethenny had an issue with the menu because she can’t eat fish, Heather jumped in to try to help—and Bethenny made it clear she could handle it herself. Heather wasn’t backing down, though, and kept pressing, which only irritated Bethenny even more. “I think at this point, Bethenny’s had a 4-year-old and if she doesn’t want to eat the fish, she’ll figure it out what to eat and what not to eat okay?” Ramona said to the camera. “You’re not her mommy, Heather.”
Clearly irked by Bethenny’s refusal of her assistance, Heather turned to Carole to complain. “I’m just trying to help. Like on one hand I’m feeling bad for her but on the other hand she’s just f—ing mean. She really is harsh,” the Yummy mogul said. “I’ve never dealt with someone who is turned off by someone trying to be nice. I couldn’t even give her a f—ing meatball!”
Things simmered down long enough for everyone to focus their attention on unofficially roasting Ramona’s maybe-date Peter, who maybe-dated Mario’s maybe-mistress at one point in time.
Suddenly, though, Heather took aim at Bethenny again, chiding her for having a side conversation and not engaging with the group. When Bethenny called her out for being ridiculous, Heather insisted she was just “making a joke.” (Though we’re not sure we buy it.) “You’re very serious,” Heather said to Bethenny. “You’ve got to lighten up.” Bethenny snapped back, prompting Heather to declare, “I can tell you what I want to f—ing tell you! Don’t tell me how to talk! Don’t tell me what to do!”
Bethenny replied by calling Heather “exhausting” and saying simply, “It’s just like, get off me.” Heather still didn’t really get it, though (or didn’t care even if she did) and the two continued to escalate the brawl until they both ended up in tears. Hey, at least it wasn’t the birthday girl this time.
Tell Us: Do you think Heather should have backed off Bethenny?
