That’s a wrap! The Oct. 12 Season 10 finale of The Real Housewives of Orange County kicked off with a (holy) bang as Tamra Judge finally got baptized, the ladies confronted Vicki Gunvalson about Brooks Ayers’ cancer drama, and Heather Dubrow sipped a lot of champagne. Lynne Curtin, Lizzie Rovsek, and Tammy Knickerbocker from Housewives past also attended the soirée, because when it comes to religious events, the more reality stars the merrier, right? Read the recap for more over-the-top moments and start counting down the days until the reunion special!
The Holy Housewife
The baptism ceremony got off to an awkward start as the women waited at the venue for Tamra to arrive. Vicki was on “high alert” because she didn’t “want to be around conflict tonight,” Shannon Beador — finally rid of that pesky, missing piece from her at-home colonic kit — worried that Vicki was “possibly going to call me nasty and disgusting again,” and Heather grabbed a glass of champagne as soon as she arrived. Because what’s a religious ceremony without some booze?
When Tamra finally met the guests at the pool, she was followed by a church choir. The performers sang about finding Jesus while Heather wracked her brain and tried to think of a Jewish equivalent to baptism — “There really isn’t an equivalent. As a matter of fact, we actually go in the other direction. Our whole slogan is ’Never Forget.’” — and the women cried. A lot.
Before Tamra entered the water, she reflected on her tumultuous past with a speech and confessed that she had forgiven her ex-husband Simon Barney for his harsh treatment and failed attempts to limit custody of their children. “For that person who put me through the pain, I forgive you. I thank you and I pray for you every single night,” she said, sniveling. “I know that I will never be perfect. I know that I will continue to mess up from time to time.” The camera then cut to Vicki, who was nodding her head and undoubtedly running through her mental list of Tamra’s past transgressions. “I’m happy to say that what was once my mess is now my message,” she concluded before stepping into the pool with Pastor Mike.
“As I go under the water, I see my whole life flashing before my eyes,” Tamra explained in a voice-over while a montage of tense clips — mostly with her ex-husband — from past seasons played. “I feel like I lived most of my life just lost, and now all these horrible feelings that I’ve had are just going away.”
The choir sang “Amazing Grace” as Tamra stepped out of the water and a gaggle of teary-eyed Housewives embraced her. “I am so proud of you and I love you like my sister,” Vicki told her. “Thank you for letting me be a part of this.”
Jesus Party Time
At the reception, the ladies broke off into their usual cliques while waiting for Tamra to dry off and get her hair and makeup redone. Vicki wasn’t in the mood for small talk and hid in the corner with her brother, Billy, and his girlfriend, Rhonda.
“In a different time, I’d be over there talking to the ladies,” the OG of the OC told the camera. “I don’t want to have any conflict with these ladies. My choice to refrain from being around them is really a conscious decision.” Okay, Vicki. We’ll see how well that strategy works out at next week’s reunion show.
Tired of gossiping about the validity of Brooks’ PET-CT scans, Heather told Shannon and Meghan King Edmonds about a new lie in the never-ending Cancergate saga. Apparently Heather heard a rumor from multiple unnamed sources that Brooks became sick after chemo and called Terry Dubrow, who sent a colleague to administer an IV drip in the middle of the night. This was old news to Shannon, who claimed that Vicki told her about the nighttime house visit when Brooks started treatment the previous October. The women didn’t bother comparing sources, though, because immediately Terry debunked the rumor. “If that were to happen, you would send him to the emergency room,” he explained. “There’s no such thing as that happening. Brooks has never called me feeling sick.”
Heather confronted Vicki, who pretended to be confused and rebuffed the gossip in the least-convincing denial in the history of the Real Housewives franchise.
“I don’t know if these ladies are my enemies or if they’re just confused. I’m trying to be a pillar of strength,” Vicki told the camera. “Satan is the author of confusion. He wants them all to be confused. I know the truth and I will pray for everyone who is confused.” That sounds totally rational, Vicki.
Oh No She Didn’t!
Tamra finally arrived at the reception and gathered the women for a selfie. Baptism may be thousands of years old, but this is 2015 after all. Vicki was noticeably MIA and her brother, Billy, pulled Tamra aside for a little chat. And then things got interesting.
“I hope you believe that the Vicki and Brooks things is all real,” he said, explaining that he had seen Brooks’ medical records earlier that day.
Tamra must have really been feeling the impact God (or the champagne) that evening because she responded with an uncharacteristic calmness. “I’m not here to judge anybody,” she said. “If he’s sick, I hope he gets better. If he’s not sick, I hope he gets better.” Not only does baptism cleanse you of your sins, but it also makes you incredibly tactful.
Shannon, on the other hand, was not as mellow. When she tried to explain her skepticism to Billy, his girlfriend, Rhonda (who was drinking Red Bull with vodka out of a red wine glass), barked, “Why would someone have to prove that they have cancer?”
Shannon started to describe the inconsistencies in Brooks’ story, but Rhonda wasn’t listening. She was out for blood.
“She didn’t ask to see the records when you thought your husband was cheating on you,” Rhonda interrupted. Then Shannon lost it.
“I feel betrayed by Vicki telling her brother’s girlfriend about David’s affair,” she said in an interview. “I can’t imagine any human being having the guts to announce at a party that someone they’ve met two times in their life had an affair. She was told to do that. Rhonda followed her instructions by someone named Vicki.”
Like a blonde, holistic predator in the wild, Shannon spotted Vicki on the other side of the room and ran across the reception to attack.
“Vicki, thank you so much for being a true friend and not telling anybody my secrets,” she yelled. “Thank you. You’re such a great friend.” Vicki looked pleased and responded with an extra sweet “you’re welcome” before Shannon ran away.
“What just happened?” Vicki asked, confused. Meghan repeated Rhonda’s comment and Vicki just rolled her eyes.
“It wasn’t like I was telling a secret. Shannon had already told Tamra and Heather,” Vicki said to the camera. “This evening is not going to end well unless we leave. Brooks has cancer. David had an affair. That’s it. There’s nothing to fight about.”
Vicki handed Tamra a tacky white picture frame (maybe she’s scrimping for that yacht she was talking about buying earlier in the episode), announced that she was leaving the party, and bolted out the door with Billy and Rhonda.
Talk About a Second Coming
Tamra grabbed backup and ran after Vicki. “If anybody could help, it’d be Pastor Mike,” the newly baptized Housewife told the camera. “You can’t argue with a pastor. It’s illegal. You go to Hell.” For someone who started attending church a year ago, Tamra seems to be the authority on all things religious.
When Pastor Mike caught up with Vicki and her crew, who were waiting for their limo outside the venue, he asked if she wanted to sit down with Shannon and work out their issues. Vicki laughed.
“No,” she scoffed. “I have no respect for Shannon Beador.”
Vicki then began to sob — because when does she ever just stick to one emotion — and complained that nobody called to ask how she was doing after her mother died.
“I’m not doing good. I’m really, really sad and all this stuff is just disgusting,” she said. “I know Jesus and I know the truth and I’m good with it. These women don’t deserve me.”
And then Vicki compared herself to Jesus.
“I’m done! I don’t deserve this,” she continued. I’ve done nothing wrong! I’m being nailed to the cross like Jesus was and he did nothing wrong. He’s Jesus Christ and he did nothing wrong! That’s how I feel.”
The other Housewives eventually found Vicki, who had another nasty back-and-forth with Shannon and refused to acknowledge any wrongdoing. Heather deemed the gossip about the Beador’s marriage “uncool,” and Vicki et al retreated to their limo. Tamra followed closely behind and tried to convince the trio to stay.
“I’m leaving. I have another party to go to,” Vicki shot back. “I’ve got to be around positive people that believe in Jesus. That’s the devil out there.”
Desperate, Tamra used the look-what-we-found-out-about-Brooks angle and revealed that Newport Imaging didn’t perform PET-CT scan. But Vicki didn’t care. “I don’t know,” she responded. “They can do all the detective work they want.”
When Tamra mentioned Briana’s suspicions, Vicki reached an unprecedented level of spite. “Briana is a sh-t starter, so she will do anything she can to destroy Brooks’ image,” she snapped. Tamra finally gave up and returned to her party with the other ladies.
“I feel like I’ve been baptized tonight,” Vicki said as her limo drove away. “I feel like I can look forward to my life knowing what my new path is.” Way to steal Tamra’s thunder and throw your daughter under the bus, Vicki.
This season may have been about new beginnings, but these Housewives are still fighting dirty.
