The queen bee. That’s what Jessica Johnson felt like going into tribal council with what she thought was a solid alliance of seven just before her torch was snuffed on Survivor season 35, “Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers.”
The nurse practitioner, 29, had faith that her fellow healers would stick together, and they did. But the bonds she formed with Ben Driebergen and Lauren Rimmer after the swap didn’t stick.
Not only was the Missouri native blindsided, but she knew that her romance with Cole Medders — combined with some serious idol paranoia — played a part in her demise.
Here, Johnson opens us up to Us about what went wrong, and why she just didn’t vibe with Chrissy Hofbeck:
Us: How did you feeling going into tribal council? Where did you think the votes were at?
JJ: This is heartbreaking to even admit. I felt like the “queen bee.” I watch Survivor, I’m a fan and I know that’s the worst line you could say. But the thing is, when you feel it and you see it, how do you not say it? I was totally wrong. Going into tribal, my feelings were strong. I knew Joe [Mena] and Desi [Williams] would come back to us. Cole, Mike [Zahalsky] and myself, we weren’t going anywhere other than with each other. I was really confident in that five. I was really confident that I had done a pretty good job at infiltrating and getting Ben and Lauren on our side. That’s where I was wrong, obviously. I had zero concern it was me. I thought the numbers would fall on Chrissy. And if they don’t, in my head, I thought, “Then I lose Cole or Joe. It’s OK. I’ll pick myself back up.” I had other options. Me going home wasn’t an option in my head. If it were, I would have totally wrecked tribal and I would have gone crazy and asked Mike for the idol. He would have given it to me. It was a great blindside. Good job, everyone (laughs).
Us: Why were you the target? Was it Joe’s idol?
JJ: Two reasons. They wanted a healer gone, period. Shame on the healers for not recognizing the huge threat we had placed on us. And for relying on relationships too much — a.k.a. me relying on Ben and Lauren. Shame on me. I was overly confident. But how can you not be confident when you kept having a great game? We kept winning. So ultimately, they assumed and knew Joe had an idol. Somebody guessed that Mike had the idol. To my knowledge, I was the only one who knew that he had the idol. Others kind of talked about it. And Mike wasn’t a threat at the time, so his name wasn’t thrown out there. Desi was safe. That left Cole and myself. He made a good statement at tribal, like, “My boy has my back” — kind of alluding to the fact that Joe would play his idol for Cole. I don’t know at what point I became Plan B. I will say that me being with Cole, and that showmance, or relationship, put me as a double target. My name came up because I was connected to Cole, which sucks.
Us: Yeah, you also seemed to be the brains behind the operation when it came to you two…
JJ: I was the one who told Cole to apologize to Ben for eating the cinnamon sticks. I was like, “Dude, what are you doing? You can’t be doing this. We’re at the merge. We need Ben and Lauren, and you have to go apologize to Ben right now. And when you do, don’t say another word for the rest of the day.” Again, I regret not being aware of myself. I felt like most of the game I protected my boys. I protected Mike from being paranoid. I protected Cole to make sure he was OK with Ben. When Joe reached the merge, I feel like I protected him and convinced Ben he wasn’t a good option. Unfortunately, I should have just been looking out for myself (laughs).
Us: It also seemed like you were constantly doing damage control.
JJ: That’s how I felt. The thing is, I never had an opportunity to break away from that damage control. When we were at the healers tribe, Cole wasn’t really acting out. We had food. We were like a huge family. We loved each other. When we split was really when the damage control came. But we kept winning. The loyalty and trust never had to be tested. I think I got into a routine of protecting Cole. I know he made some huge mistakes. But bottom line is, I knew he would not write my name down. So at what point are you like, “You’re too much of a liability. I need to get rid of you”? I’m good at getting rid of people! I break up with people all the time in real life! At what point do you break up the showmance? I never had a chance to. Am I strong enough in my social game to get Cole to the final three? He’s a great final three. Everyone hates him. So it protects me. It was constant turmoil (laughs).
Us: Do you think Ben would have stayed with you guys if maybe you targeted someone other than his ally Chrissy?
JJ: I would love to know what really happened in Ben’s mind. Ultimately, I think it was the strength of the healers that made Ben go with the other majority. I was really pleased to see last night in the edit that Lauren really tried to defend the Yawa alliance. I was like, “Yes, that’s my girl.” Good for her for choosing the majority. What was kind of shocking to me was seeing Devon being so hardcore about getting rid of a healer. What I think happened was we had multiple people all really deciding as a group. And in that moment, if you’re a good player, you say yes. “Let’s get rid of a strong player as long as it’s not me.” So many people from other tribes recognized a healer had to go. I clap my hands for Ben and Lauren because it was good for them. I hate to speak for my fellow healers, but I don’t believe we would have voted each other out until we had to. So Ben and Lauren, had they joined us, they would have been gone. So they made the best decision for their game. It just didn’t include me.
Us: Why did you guys target Chrissy?
JJ: Chrissy is an interesting character. I never played with her except for the day at the merge. I did not get great vibes from her. I tend to make really good relationships with females. I relate to them. I have a ton of best friends. The day of the merge, I remember trying to have a conversation with her, and her slightly being cold. I pick up on that quick. In my head, I’m thinking, “Oh no, no, no. You’re one of those. You’re a woman who feels threatened by other women and you get them out.” Maybe in life, but definitely in this game. Ben spoke very highly of Chrissy, so I knew at some level, they had a relationship. Ben and I had a really close bond as well. I knew if Ben had any woman in his life, it needed to be me. Because he wouldn’t have both Chrissy and me. That was apparent at the merge — the vibes I got from Chrissy. That’s why we wrote her name down. The thing I just described about Chrissy, other people agreed with. So it seemed like an easy pick.
Us: How are you and Cole these days? Friends or more? And do you think he was the ultimate reason you lost?
JJ: Cole and I are definitely friends. We have seen each other after the game. Do I think he cost me the game? I want to say no, but anyone who watches Survivor knows it’s a big issue when you get into a relationship with someone else. Whether or not that showmance was real is very confusing because we are two seemingly attractive people who were attracted to each other. Why can’t you have love and money at the same time, right? (laughs) What was real? What was fake? Who was playing who? We both had days where we thought we were against each other and then days where we were like, “No, we are together. This is great.” Ultimately, I do believe he cost me the game because the day of the merge I really think if I had not been so consumed with damage control with him, then I maybe could have picked up on the interactions with Lauren and myself. And maybe picked up on, “Yeah, Jessica. You are not OK.” There was another moment I had with Devon. I remember thinking, “Devon and I just met. Why isn’t he being more friendly with me? I’m a friendly person.” Again, that was off my radar because I was so consumed with just keeping my boys together. Obviously, it was my downfall.
Us: And finally, I know you were completely blindsided, but do you think there was anything you could have done at tribal to stay in the game? Or were the votes locked?
JJ: I really hate to admit this, but at tribal, I really didn’t think it was me. Because I know myself and I wanted this game so bad. I wanted to play after the merge. I was aware that I wasn’t playing the game of Survivor before. I mean, we were playing, but we were winning. So nothing was tried and tested. I feel like I missed out. I had so much game left! But in that moment, I’m embarrassed to say that I had no idea know it was me. If I had, I would have easily leaned over to Mike and said, “Play the idol for me now or I’ll cut off your head.” I wanted to play this game so much harder. I would have done anything to save myself if I had known.
Survivor airs on CBS Wednesdays at 8 p.m.
