Ali Fedotowsky can remember the exact day she decided to have a baby. The Bachelorette alum and TV personality, 31, wrote about the moment on her personal blog in a post titled “Our Baby Story — The First Trimester” on Sunday, January 31.

Fedotowsky recalled inviting friends over to her house this past 4th of July for a cookout; alas, every single invitee declined the spontaneous invite, citing their kids and family commitments. So she and her fiancé, Kevin Manno, decided to take a few months for their “last hurrah” as a kid-free couple and then try for their first child.

But when their plans to party ended with them going to bed early every night, the couple decided there were no point in waiting. Just a few short months later Fedotowsky was pregnant.

“It was rough because I was sick all the time!” she revealed of her first trimester on the blog. “I lost about 7lbs in my first trimester because I couldn’t really eat anything. I only ate clementines and dry toast for about a month between weeks 7-12.”

Her dietary restrictions and severe nausea led to lots of crying and cravings.

“I remember breaking down in tears once because all I wanted was to want a pizza,” she said. “It’s like I knew I liked pizza, I knew how delicious it tasted, but the thought of it made me sick to my stomach.”

Her concerned fiancé couldn’t relate to her pizza apathy.

“The way I tried to explain it to Kevin is that I felt like I constantly had a hangover but I never got to enjoy the fun part the night before,” she continued. “That’s the best way I can describe my first trimester, one long hangover.”

But the pair have had good moments too. They have already gotten to see their future child in a sonogram five times, and feel their parental instincts kicking in.

“We also feel such a sense of relief when we see the baby at those appointments, and as soon as we leave the doctors office, the panic sets back in,” Fedotowsky explained. “All we want to do is see the baby again! Is this what being a parent is like? Constantly worrying about your child?”

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