Melissa Rauch is pregnant and expecting her first child with her husband, Winston Rauch. The Big Bang Theory actress announced the news in an essay for Glamour.com, while also opening up about suffering a previous miscarriage.
“Here is the only statement regarding my pregnancy that doesn’t make me feel like a complete fraud: ‘Melissa is expecting her first child. She is extremely overjoyed, but if she’s being honest, due to the fact that she had a miscarriage the last time she was pregnant, she’s pretty much terrified at the moment that it will happen again,’” Rauch wrote in the emotional essay, published on Tuesday, July 11.
“The miscarriage I experienced was one of the most profound sorrows I have ever felt in my life. It kickstarted a primal depression that lingered in me,” she continued. “The image of our baby on the ultrasound monitor — without movement, without a heartbeat — after we had seen that same little heart healthy and flickering just two weeks prior completely blindsided us and haunts me to this day.”
The actress also noted how the term “miscarriage” itself is offensive to someone who has lost a child and gives advice to any women who have also suffered the same experience.
“‘Miscarriage’ by the way, deserves to be ranked as one of the worst, most blame-inducing medical terms ever. To me, it immediately conjures up an implication that it was the woman’s fault, like she somehow ‘mishandled the carrying of this baby,’” she added. “Due to reasons beyond anyone’s control, miscarriage is estimated to occur in anywhere from 15 to 20 percent of recognized pregnancies. There was nothing you could’ve done to change the situation. Most importantly, please be kind to yourself.”
Rauch wrote that the unexpected hormonal drop-off caused her to start inexplicably “projectile crying” while watching HGTV, and urges others to stop asking women about their baby plans. “So, before any of us ask a woman about popping out a baby, let’s think to ourselves: We don’t know what she’s going through, what her body is capable of, or what she personally desires. Whether a woman wants to have children or not, if she wants to share that information, she will.”
“All I really know for sure is that this experience has changed me forever. I know it’s made me grateful for every moment of my current pregnancy, and I hope it will make me a better mother in some capacity when I can finally hold the child that has been in my heart in my arms,” she wrote. “So, to all the women out there who are dealing with fertility issues, have gone through a miscarriage or are going through the pain of it currently, allow me to leave you with this message: You are not alone. And, it is perfectly OK to not be OK right now.”
Rauch met her husband Winston Beigel in college. She is set to star in The Secret Lunches of Chelsea & Ivanka, a one-night play on July 24 that she co-wrote with him. All proceeds will benefit Planned Parenthood.