Jada Pinkett Smith broke down the difference between fantasy and reality in romantic relationships as she opened up about her 21-year marriage to Will Smith on the latest episode of Red Table Talk.
“Let me tell you, nobody talks about the sacrifice, the deterioration and the dissolving of fantasies,” the 47-year-old said on the Facebook Watch show. “I always feel like we fall in love with the goddess or the god within that person, and then when we actually meet the human being, then we gotta learn how to love that one.”
Talking to mother Adrienne Banfield-Norris, daughter Willow Smith, and guests Justin Baldoni and Wale, Pinkett Smith said that acceptance is crucial to an enduring relationship: “The reason why it’s so important to me to be able to stick it out, is because to really get to the true meaning of love, in my opinion, it is unconditional. It has to be. Because we are all too flawed, no matter how much work to do.”
The Girls Trip star revealed that she had “very hard expectations” of her suitors, Smith included. “The way I ended up with Will, I had to change my whole perspective because — I want you to know something — he was not the dude,” she said emphatically. “But I had to change that. I can’t ask somebody to be for me what I am not willing to be for them. And what I realized in my partnership with Will was that I was asking him to be a lot of things for me that I wasn’t willing to do for me.”
Pinkett Smith also discussed her low points with the Aladdin actor. “There have been several occasions where you just had enough and you want to leave, and I just couldn’t or Will just couldn’t,” she said. “Because we knew this was what was meant to be, this partnership, no matter what the form is. We had to redefine it, reform it, change it. We don’t call ourselves married anymore — we’re in a life partnership.”
The couple wed in 1997 and then welcomed Jaden, 20, and Willow, 18. Smith also shares son Trey, 26, with ex-wife Sheree Fletcher.
