Oksana Grigorieva Didn't Think She'd "Live Through" Gibson Battle

Credit: Carlos Alvarez/Getty Images; Michael Kovac/FilmMagic

In her first television interview on Larry King Live, Oksana Grigorieva, 40, revealed that she taped her frightful conversations with Mel Gibson, 54, because she thought she was going to die on the evening of the recordings.

She and Gibson have a 1-year-old daughter, Lucia -- and faced off in court last week in their ongoing custody battle.

"I started taping it around 11 o'clock because I thought, 'I'm actually not going to live through the night. I'm actually not going to live through the night and..." she said according to Entertainment Tonight.

Grigorieva added that she hoped her mother would share the tapes with the police. "I wanted my mother to be able to prove that if I'm dead that this is who did it."

As for why she stayed with Gibson, Grigorieva admitted it was a mistake. "I stayed for a little bit too long," she said. "I gave him the last chance. He asked me for the last chance. He begged. He cried. He cried on his knees. What am I supposed to do?"

The interview will air on Larry King Live on Wednesday, November 17, at 9 p.m. ET on CNN.