Bottoms up! For the premiere episode of Kocktails With Khloé, the freshly blonded Khloé Kardashian wrangled celebrity guests including Aisha Tyler, Brandi Glanville, Kym Whitley (Young & Hungry), Snoop Dogg (yes, Snoop Dogg) and her own sister Kendall Jenner. Billed as a talk show, Khloé explained, "This is what I do at home. My friends come over, and we play games, and I wanted to do it in a controlled environment" (by "controlled environment," she presumably meant on a TV set).
The format for the new FYI series was a bit loose but paralleled a dinner party, with some games thrown into the mix that for some inexplicable reason didn't actually involve drinking. There was a signature cocktail of the night called Smoky Eyes, but not everyone tried it. (Glanville insisted she was "worried about mixing" and thought she should just stick with wine — fortunately, she had brought her very own bottle along for just that purpose.)
Khloé Laments the Double Standard
In a clear attempt to get things going, Khloé opened up about her frustrations regarding her separation from Lamar Odom.
"During my separation, I'm like, 'OK, I've been waiting for this divorce to go through, but I'm going to date someone,'" she explained. "For women, you're so judged, and everyone's saying, 'She's still married and still dating,' and I'm like, 'Why can men do this?' Or during someone's marriage, if they cheat or whatever, no one throws stones at them; why am I cast as some jezebel?"
Kendall Prank-Calls Kim and Tells Her She's Pregnant
Urged by Khloé to prank-call Kim Kardashian, Kendall obliged. Luckily, the mother of two was on hand to answer the phone. Kendall took a breath and told Kim she needed help. "I don't even like saying it. It makes me want to cry," she began. "I'm pregnant."
Kim didn't believe her at first, but Kendall insisted, "I'm serious … and I felt like if I told Mom, she would freak out, so I was coming to you for your support first."
Kim told Kendall she thought this was a bigger conversation than she was prepared to have at the moment because she was running on one hour of sleep and currently breast-feeding her newborn son, Saint, but did generously offer to "save a lot of baby clothes" for her. She also said she could get Kendall birth control, which seemed odd since it would appear to be a little late for that, and also it's hard to believe Kendall isn't old enough to handle that task on her own.
"I'm on birth control! That's the craziest part!" Kendall chimed, prompting Kim to add, "That's what happened to Kourtney!"
When Kendall asked, point blank, if she should get rid of it, Kim was more cautious with her words. "I'm more mom mode now," she began. "If you had asked me before I had kids, I would have been like, 'Are you kidding? Your career is everything! Don't f--k that up! Are you insane? You're not married, blah, blah, blah.' But after going through it and doing every way that I probably didn't imagine, I'm like, 'Oh, my God, everything is sent from God, and it's meant to be.'"
Just as Kendall began to fake cry, Khloé pulled the plug on the operation, confessed it was a prank and told Kim, "I love you and when you lose a few LBs I want you to come on Kocktails With Khloé!" Kim also claimed that she knew who would have been the baby daddy, had Kendall actually been with child.
Brandi Glanville Revealed Why She Thinks She Was Cut from RHOBH
Later in the evening, Khloé asked Glanville what the deal was with her not being a cast member of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills anymore. "They didn't ask me back full time," Brandi shrugged. "I was really counting on the paycheck."
Khloé asked Glanville why she thought that had happened. "I could guess," Glanville began. "Well, I did tell Andy Cohen to f--k off, not only on TV, via text, via email, and via Twitter, because I felt like within the show, I was literally the only one there that needed the paycheck … and I would take one for the team." According to Glanville, she delivered the much-needed drama when the franchise needed it most.
"People were coming for me," the former model continued. "I'm like, 'You know what? We have no story and you guys are boring. I'm going to be a dick right now.'"
Cohen might not be a fan, but Snoop Dogg is. "They took your personality, and they engulfed that in every other Housewives show that existed after you," the iconic rapper mused. "There was something you were doing right." That seemed to make Glanville feel at least a little bit better.
Other important factoids we learned during the premiere: Eleven years ago, Snoop Dogg stopped smoking marijuana for 180 days, and back in the day, Caitlyn and Kris Jenner joined the mile-high club.
Tell Us: What did you think of Kocktails With Khloé?
Kocktails With Khloé airs on FYI on Wednesdays at 10 p.m. EST.
Sign up now for the Us Weekly newsletter to get breaking celebrity news, hot pics and more delivered straight to your inbox!