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Emmys 2015 Host Andy Samberg: 10 Best Opening Monologue Jokes From Mocking Jon Hamm to Jane Lynch as the Game of Thrones Nun!

Andy Samberg
Emmys host Andy Samberg opened the 67th show with a series of hilarious jokes on Sept. 20.

What, no Lonely Island? The 2015 Emmy Awards got off to a bang thanks to host Andy Samberg, who opened with a video skit about binge-watching all of the recent TV shows. Moments later, the funnyman hit the stage to serve up a quippy opening monologue complete with a series of perfectly timed jokes. 

Related: PHOTOS: Stars at the 2015 Emmys

No one was off limits for the SNL alum, 37, who teased government employee Kim Davis, presidential hopeful Donald Trump, and the inequality in Hollywood from race to gender. 

Here were his best jokes:

1. “The Emmys are all about celebrating the best in television, so sorry, books, not tonight!” he said before the graphic “Suck It Books” popped up on the screen.  

2. “There are some changes in how certain shows are categorized this year. For example, Orange Is the New Black is now technically a new drama, while Louie is now technically jazz.”

Related: PHOTOS: Emmys hosts through the years

3. “Tonight, instead of being played off by the orchestra, you’re going to have to deal with the mean nun from Game of Thrones. So keep those speeches tight,” Samberg joked as Glee‘s Jane Lynch walked on stage shouting “Shame! Shame! Shame!” in a black robe. 

Andy Samberg and Jane Lynch
Host Andy Samberg and Jane Lynch speak onstage during the 67th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards.

4. “This is the most diverse group of nominees in Emmys history, so congratulations, Hollywood, you did it. Racism is over, don’t fact-check that!”

5. “The wage gap between men and women hired in Hollywood is still an issue. Wait, sorry, I misread that. The age gap between men and women hired in Hollywood is still an issue. Wait, I’m sorry I misread again. It’s both, still both.”

Related: PHOTOS: SNL's most successful stars

6. “Donald Trump is running for president, to the delight of uncles everywhere. I’ve got to say, sure, Donald Trump seems racist…wait what else?” 

7. “Paula Deen is on this season of Dancing With the Stars, but I’ve got to say, if I wanted to see an intolerant woman dance, I would have gone to one of Kim Davis’ four weddings. It’s so ironic that she came out of jail to ‘Eye of the Tiger’ when you consider how many dudes have boned each other to that song.”

8. “It’s been a year of goodbyes. We said goodbye to Mad Men and Parks and Recreation and we also said goodbye to True Detective, even though it’s still on the air.”

9. “My friend Jon Hamm was nominated for Mad Men for the last time. But don’t worry, after the success of Better Call Saul, I’m sure Jon will be nominated for the upcoming Mad Men prequel: Dick Whitman Horny Hobo.” 

10. “[Amy] Schumer is really, really funny, you know, for a person.”

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