Jamie Otis Honors Baby Boy 3 Years After Suffering Miscarriage: ‘We Will Meet Again One Day’

In memoriam. Jamie Otis shared a sweet tribute to her baby boy three years after suffering a miscarriage.

“Happy angelversary to our first born son, Johnathan Edward,” the Married at First Sight alum, 33, captioned a throwback photo with her husband, Doug Hehner, and their late infant on Saturday, July 13. “Three years ago today I sat on a hospital stretcher pushing and screaming in excruciating pain. I was delivering my baby boy at just 17 weeks, 1 day pregnant. I remember this day vividly. The pain was an out of body experience. It was a pain my SOUL felt.”

View this post on Instagram

Happy angelversary to our first born son, Johnathan Edward.👼🏼💙 Three years ago today I sat on a hospital stretcher pushing and screaming in excruciating pain. I was delivering my baby boy at just 17 weeks, 1 day pregnant.🤰🏼 • I remember this day vividly. The pain was an out of body experience. It was a pain my SOUL felt. • His little body was was so tiny and fragile, but he was *perfect* with all ten fingers and ten toes.👣 I held him close and kissed his sweet face. He was way too small to survive.😢 I hate that I never got the chance to rock him to sleep or bounce him til he laughed. My heart aches I couldn’t protect and nurture him. I’d have given *anything* to keep him safe so he could grow to be healthy, happy & strong. • …I always wonder what it’d be like to have him running around the house. Would he have liked cars and trucks or bugs and animals? I know he is up in heaven bouncing on clouds and dancing with the angels now.😇☁️ • As I kissed his sweet face goodbye I whispered to him that I would spend my life honoring his and I’ll *never* break that promise.🙏🏻👼🏻 • 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage/loss.😢 if you’re a mama in the midst of this – the pain is excrutiating.💔 I’m so sorry, mama.🙏🏻 I won’t say “Everything happens for a reason” or “At least you know you can get pregnant” bc I remember secretly hating it every time someone said things like that to me. Like, what could be a good reason for Johnathan not having the chance at life? AND yes I am thankful I can get pregnant but I wanted THAT pregnancy – THAT baby.😞 • What I will say is this: Even though you’re going through some of the darkest days of your life, please know the storm doesn’t come without leaving a rainbow at the end.🌈🙏🏻 And it’s ok to cry, scream, and GRIEVE as long as you need.💗 • I truly believe that my angel up in heaven is watching over us everyday and we will meet again one day. Until then, I will spend my life honoring his short one.💫🙏🏻✨ • • #pregnancylossawarness #infantloss #awarness #angelbaby #rainbowbaby #giveback #family #mommyofanangel #pregnancyloss #rip #johnathanedward #firstborn #son #myangel #mommylovesyou #daddylovesyou

A post shared by J a m i e O t i s ✨ (@jamienotis) on

After the Bachelor alum opened up about holding Johnathan’s “tiny and fragile” body and “kiss[ing] his sweet face,” she revealed that she still imagines what it would be like to have him “running around the house.”

“Would he have liked cars and trucks or bugs and animals?” the former reality star wrote. “I truly believe that my angel up in heaven is watching over us everyday and we will meet again one day. Until then, I will spend my life honoring his short one.”

One year after the loss, Otis and her husband, 35, welcomed a baby girl, Henley Grace. The couple have suffered two more miscarriages since their daughter’s arrival.

In March, they opened up to Us Weekly exclusively about trying to conceive another child. “It does become scientific,” Hehner told Us at the time. “We don’t really schedule [sex], but we know when we’re fertile.”

His wife added, “It’s really funny. Sometimes I’ll be like, ‘OK, this is the day, peak fertility!’ and he’ll be like, ‘Oh, you’re going to have to woo me.’ I think that’s romantic in and of itself.”

The pair tied the knot on season 1 of Married at First Sight in 2014.

For access to all our exclusive celebrity videos and interviews – Subscribe on Youtube!