Everything Becca Tilley Said About Her ‘Private’ Relationship With Hayley Kiyoko Before Dating Confirmation

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Everything Becca Tilley Said About Her ‘Private’ Relationship With Hayley Kiyoko Before Dating Confirmation

UPDATE: In May 2022, Becca Tilley confirmed that Hayley Kiyoko is her mystery partner. “Hard to say if this is a hard or soft launch, but it is a launch ❤️ #95p,” she wrote alongside footage of their relationship via Instagram hours after Kiyoko dropped a music video inspired by Tilley’s past in Bachelor Nation. ORIGINAL STORY BELOW: Becca Tilley may be lucky in love, but the former Bachelor contestant isn’t ready for the world to know who she is giving her roses to — yet. Tilley first competed for Chris Soules’ heart on season 19 of The Bachelor, which aired in 2015. While she made it to the final two, the farmer proposed to Whitney Bischoff and sent Tilley packing. (Soules and Bischoff called it quits less than a year after the finale aired.) The clothing designer took a second shot at reality TV romance on Ben Higgins’ season of The Bachelor, which aired in 2016. Tilley finished in the top five. "I think I went into it with the mindset of, 'If this is meant to be with this person, then it's meant to be and I'm gonna embrace this time that I have and try not to overthink it and stress about it.' And it is a bizarre feeling to become friends with people who are dating the same person as you," Tilley told Entertainment Tonight about the reality series in June 2019. "It's not a natural setting in the sense you're watching it all happen around you, but I made some of the closest friendships I've had because of the show. So, I'm really thankful." Tilley, who was open about being a virgin on the series, moved on with Robert Graham, who appeared on season 9 of The Bachelorette and season 1 of Bachelor in Paradise. Us Weekly broke the news of their split in May 2017. [jwplayer Kgk68bxz-l3ahXupL] “It’s fun. We’ve been friends for a long time and it was just a natural progression, and he’s just amazing and been patient with me,” she told Us in December 2016 about their romance. “I need someone that’s patient and willing to deal with me, and he’s been that way. So it’s been fun, it’s been an easy transition.” Three months later, Tilley told Us that their relationship “just ended.” “The reason that Robert and I aren’t together is because I felt like I was really busy with work and traveling a lot so it wasn’t a sense of like, ‘Oh, I want to be free and date as many guys as possible.’ It was more of me just wanting to take this time for myself and focus on me and what I’m doing,” she told Us in September 2017. “It wasn’t like one of us cheated or there was this bitterness. I still care a lot about him and there’s no hard feelings. Hopefully on either side, but I can say that for me.” In late 2018, Tilley confirmed she was off the market again, but has yet to reveal who she is seeing. More recently, in February 2022, Tilley revealed that she and her mystery love are still going strong. “I’m in a relationship. Almost 4 years,” she told a fan via an Instagram Q&A. Scroll through for everything Tilley has said about her romance:

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Four Years of Love

“I have been crying on & and off all day. I don’t know that I can properly form adequate words to express how much the love and support means, but I just want to say thank you ♥️,” the Bachelor season 19 runner-up wrote via Instagram Story in May 2022 after confirming she was in a relationship with Kiyoko. “And to everyone who has known about us for the last 4 years and gave us the time and space to do it in our own time — the magnitude of that alone is not lost on me. I am so grateful.”

She concluded: “Hayley, thank you for showing me how to be brave and how to love myself. I’m so glad I don’t have to avoid pronouns on the podcast now. I love you 💜.”

Credit: Courtesy of Becca Tilley/Instagram

On Not Hiding

“Being private on social media is not the same as hiding. People already have an opinion on about my relationship and I haven’t even shared it,” Tilley told a fan during a February 2022 Instagram Q&A. “Makes sense why I want to protect it? But maybe one day! It’ll be our choice though.”

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On If She’s With The One

Tilley teased on a February 2020 episode of her “Scrubbing In” podcast that she is “95 percent” sure she will marry her current partner.

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On Keeping Things Private

“I just think that my relationship that I’m in is just, I like that it’s private and it’s my own,” the reality TV personality told Us in September 2019. “I had a public relationship before and it just felt like I had a lot of people involved, which I know that’s why they sort of watched me in the first place.” 

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On Future Plans to Share

Tilley told Us in September 2019 that she doesn’t “have a timeline” when it comes to sharing her significant other’s identity. “I just feel if the moment comes where I’m like, ‘Oh, I’m just going to say something,’ then I will,” she said. “I’m really happy and I hope to eventually start opening up about it more, but I’m happy with it being private right now.”

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On Her Restrictions

Tilley told Us in November 2019 that not posting about her relationship on social media is the only major restriction.

“It’s mostly just posting and talking about it,” she said told Us. “I live my life.”

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On How Her Family Feels

The Bachelor alum told Us at the 2nd Annual American Influencer Awards in November 2019 that her parents haven’t met her mystery love.

“My family lives far away, so my sisters I guess have been introduced, but not  the rest of my family,” she told Us at the time. “I’m really happy. I'm in a really good place.”

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On Not Feeling ‘Safe’ With Public Relationships Anymore

"I think I have shared less of my personal life mostly because I came off a show where my whole dating life, everything about me, was out there on display for everyone to have an opinion about and everyone to talk about and know everything about. And then after The Bachelor, I was in a public relationship and posted about everything about it on Instagram and YouTube or wherever — and when we broke up, there was this pressure that I felt just about letting people down who were rooting for my relationship,” Tilley told ET in June 2019. "I remember thinking, 'I don't feel safe just being honest and real, because I don't know what people are going to say or what assumptions they're going to make.' So I kind of decided after that, it was something that I could protect.”

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On Being in Love

Tilley and her “Scrubbing In” podcast cohost Tanya Rad played a game of Truth or Drink on a June 2019 episode on their show. When asked if she is “in love,” Tilley answered, “Yes.” Later during the game, Tilley opted to take a shot instead of naming the person she is dating. 

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On Marriage Plans

"The life-long partnership scares me a little bit. I think just looking forward, I just want to be with someone who I'm excited to see every day in some capacity,” she told ET in June 2019. “Like, I get home from a long day, and they make me feel excited… no matter how tired I am, I'm still happy to see them." 

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Longtime Love

Tilley confirmed in December 2019 that she has bene seeing her significant other for more than a year after meeting at a party. 

"I think it was just an instant connection. I've never had something so instant, like, from the beginning," she told Entertainment Tonight. "If there's a moment where I feel like, 'OK, I'm ready to let everybody into my relationship and everyone can have an opinion on it,’ [then I will share].”