Owning his mistakes. After being booted from the Bachelor in Paradise beach, Chris Conran attempted to clear the air about his behavior toward costar Jessenia Cruz.
“Finally watched the episode and I feel there are a few things that need to be said,” the Utah native, 28, wrote in a lengthy Instagram Story statement one day after his exit from the ABC series aired on Tuesday, September 7. “First and foremost, I take complete accountability for my blatant disrespect toward Jessenia, and handling the situation poorly.”
Chris revealed that he privately contacted Jessenia, also 28, “after getting home” from filming to properly apologize. “I would like to reiterate my sincerest apologies to her now,” he wrote. “My past behavior is not a reflection of who I am or who I want to be, and it was never my intention to maliciously or purposefully hurt anyone on the show.”
Since his time on the Bachelor Nation spinoff was cut short, the landscape design salesman has been focusing on self-improvement. “I’ve been doing work privately to work through my relationship & communication skills,” he continued. “I’m an awful communicator and I’m an extremely non-confrontational person. It’s something I’ve needed to fix and I’m glad it’s been brought to light.”
During Tuesday’s episode, Chris found himself at the center of a dramatic love triangle with Jessenia and newcomer Alana Milne. Though the season 16 Bachelorette alum seemed to be going strong with Jessenia, he promptly ditched her for Alana, 27, during an invite-only party thrown by guest host Tituss Burgess.
In a confessional, Jessenia hinted that Chris had a history with Alana, who she claimed “threw herself” at him on a group trip to San Diego before season 7 filming began. The Texas native watched as Chris and Alana repeatedly made out before deciding to leave the party.
When Alana officially joined the other competitors on the beach, she asked Chris to go on a one-on-one with her, sparking outrage among the BiP cast. After coming back from their date, the duo were asked to leave Mexico.
“I entered Paradise with integrity,” Chris wrote in his lengthy apology. “I was by no means in a relationship prior to the show. Nobody in the ‘San Diego crew’ was in a relationship beforehand. I hung out with both Alana and Jessenia in a group setting. I met both of them, and had the same reshow relationship prior to Paradise. [I was] flirty and excited to potentially see them on Paradise.”
Alana, who briefly appeared on season 25 of The Bachelor, unfairly “got mixed up in all” the drama, Chris continued. “I beg all of you to stop attacking and harassing her,” he added. “She doesn’t deserve the hate she’s receiving, and the death threats need to stop.”
Being “pushed out of Paradise sucked,” he admitted, but he recognized that the other cast members saw him as “low hanging fruit since I’m not a fan favorite.” He went on to reference Joe Amabile and Riley Christian, who were the leaders behind Chris’ exile.
“It also takes a huge level of disrespect for grown men to shut a woman down when she’s trying to use her voice,” he wrote. “You two know she deserves an apology. We cannot have a culture where we silence women on this show.”
While he owned up to being “disrespectful” and wished he “carried [him]self better,” Chris asserted that he doesn’t “regret following [his] heart.”
Jessenia, for her part, previously denied having anything more than a friendship with Chris before going to Mexico.
“We had dinner or lunch, that kind of thing, but it was never anything beyond that. … Just to set the record straight, there was absolutely no romantic relationship going on before the show even started,” she exclusively told Us Weekly in August. “I had my first impression of him in San Diego and figured, you know, he seems cool.”
Bachelor in Paradise airs on ABC Mondays and Tuesdays at 8 p.m. ET.
