As Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner navigate her pregnancy with twins, she is wary about the potential of dealing with postpartum depression after giving birth.
“I had a really, really, really tough time postpartum with my son,” Otis, 37, exclusively told Us Weekly on Thursday, May 9. “I had such bad postpartum depression and I’m a labor and delivery nurse. I recognized the symptoms and I knew that my thoughts were very irrational and I recognized that it was happening, but I couldn’t figure out how to help myself.”
While Otis did start seeing a therapist to help get treatment, she is nervous about falling “back into that postpartum depression” when she gives birth later this year. Otis and Hehner, 40, share daughter Henley, 6, and son Hendrix, 3, and are expecting twins.
Despite excitedly preparing for the twins’ arrival, Otis looked back with Us on her postpartum depression struggles from her last pregnancy.
“My life was great, but yet I was suicidal and it didn’t make any sense and I knew that in my heart, I knew that that wasn’t rational, but yet I couldn’t stop the feelings. I think that the one thing that you can do if you’re pregnant and you’re trying to avoid postpartum depression, at least based on my previous experience, is to ask for help,” she said. “I was so stressed and overwhelmed and maybe if I had taken some time and not felt guilty for needing it, I mean, it’s OK if you need someone else to take care of your baby for even a full day because you need to sleep. I’m trying to myself that advice and actually listen to that advice so that I don’t fall back into that trap.”
Last time, Otis specifically dealt with “irrational” thoughts about Hehner’s fidelity. (The couple recently celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary after tying the knot on season 1 of Married at First Sight.)
“I was really concerned that he was cheating on me. I feel like he was gone a lot. He’s always been a bit of a wanderer. He just, like, dawdles when he’s doing anything,” Otis told Us. “I was genuinely concerned and any little tiny sign of it heightened that concern and he was adamant that he wasn’t [having an affair].”
Otis had been certain that Hehner was having an affair when she found a face mask in his car during the height of the coronavirus pandemic.
“I was like, ‘Why is there a woman’s mask in the car?’ But turns out it was just the nanny’s,” she recalled on Thursday, noting Hehner repeatedly denied the accusations. “You can take those signs and you can really develop a story in your own mind. … But, thankfully, we also had a therapist who was like, ‘OK, Jamie,’ and she was able to be the outside perspective.”
Otis went on to praise therapy for helping the pair “get through that” situation.
“Also, I think me coming out of postpartum depression was really helpful to be able to see the situation a little bit differently,” Otis said, also noting that they’ve stopped discussing relationship issues with family and friends. “There was just things like that that happened that could truly be innocent or they could truly be detrimental. We have said since day one that cheating is a dealbreaker [and] I am not dealing with that.”
Hehner, for his part, didn’t “necessarily recognize” Otis’ postpartum depression symptoms at first.
“[I am] just trying to do everything I possibly can,” he said. “But I think we — through therapy and couples counseling and things like that — [are] more equipped now than ever to be able to handle anything.”
Hehner continued, “This woman here is a fighter and she’s overcome so much in her life, and I think she’s only had to really rely on herself growing up. I think when you feel helpless, but you also feel like you want to do everything you can rely on yourself, it becomes a pattern of trying to do it all and getting overwhelmed.”
As the couple prepare to expand their family, they continue to share milestones via their “Hanging With the Hehner’s” YouTube channel.
“I think we’re in a unique position where our fans have been with us since we first met. Our fans have watched us grow into love,” Hehner said. “They’ve watched Henley being born on Married at First Sight. They watched Hendrix being born on Married at First Sight. I think having the ability to capture the little moments and just random moments and things that pop up [is a blessing].”
Otis and Hehner’s “super raw and unedited” videos will chronicle Otis’ entire pregnancy with the twins.
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org.
With reporting by Christina Garibaldi
