Everything Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler Have Said About Their Split: ‘I Didn’t Want to Be in a Toxic Relationship Anymore’

Credit: Shutterstock (2)

Everything Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler Have Said About Their Split: 'I Didn’t Want to Be in a Toxic Relationship Anymore'

A long time coming. Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler have not held back about their decision to end their relationship after 10 years together. The former couple announced their split in April 2020, writing in a joint statement via Instagram, "We have nothing but love and respect for one another and are deeply grateful for the years shared, memories made, and the children we are so proud of. This is just the situation of two people growing apart." For the former Chicago Bears quarterback, moving on came with its own set of challenges. "The whole [dating] landscape has changed. There are apps, there's Twitter, there's Instagram, it's a whole different ball game," Cutler, who was linked to Jana Kramer and Madison LeCroy after his breakup, detailed during an episode of his "Uncut With Jay Cutler" podcast in August 2021. "You're not just walking into a restaurant or bar and talking to somebody. That doesn't exist anymore." The former athlete, who shares kids Camden, Jaxon, and Saylor, with Cavallari, admitted that it was "hard as hell" for him to find someone new. "Meeting people is hard. I think finding out what people really want from you, I think that's probably an issue," he added at the time. "I'm at a different phase of my life now with kids. It isn't just a purely selfish play by my part." [jwplayer Qj2tcpoM-zhNYySv2] The reality star, for her part, later revealed that the former couple attempted to give their relationship one more try amid their divorce. “Jay and I actually went on a couple of dates, like, months and months and months ago," the Hills alum shared on the "Off the Vine" podcast in October 2021. “But then I was, like, it’s not there for me anymore.” According to the Uncommon James founder, the "scariest thing" she has ever done was get a divorce. "But it's been the best thing that I've ever done and that has really jumpstarted my journey on self-love and figuring out who I am now," she explained during an episode of "The School of Greatness" in June 2022. The businesswoman noted that her children influenced her outlook on the next chapter of her life. "My kids have inspired me to become the best version of myself," she added at the time. "I can only be as good to my kids as I am to myself. If I am empty, I have nothing to give them. Being able to be energized and love myself so I can love on my kids — and support them and encourage them — that's the most important thing." Scroll down for Cavallari and Cutler's most candid quotes about their split: [podcast_block]

Credit: Shutterstock (2)

Everything Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler Have Said About Their Split: 'I Didn’t Want to Be in a Toxic Relationship Anymore'

A long time coming. Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler have not held back about their decision to end their relationship after 10 years together. The former couple announced their split in April 2020, writing in a joint statement via Instagram, "We have nothing but love and respect for one another and are deeply grateful for the years shared, memories made, and the children we are so proud of. This is just the situation of two people growing apart." For the former Chicago Bears quarterback, moving on came with its own set of challenges. "The whole [dating] landscape has changed. There are apps, there's Twitter, there's Instagram, it's a whole different ball game," Cutler, who was linked to Jana Kramer and Madison LeCroy after his breakup, detailed during an episode of his "Uncut With Jay Cutler" podcast in August 2021. "You're not just walking into a restaurant or bar and talking to somebody. That doesn't exist anymore." The former athlete, who shares kids Camden, Jaxon, and Saylor, with Cavallari, admitted that it was "hard as hell" for him to find someone new. "Meeting people is hard. I think finding out what people really want from you, I think that's probably an issue," he added at the time. "I'm at a different phase of my life now with kids. It isn't just a purely selfish play by my part." [jwplayer Qj2tcpoM-zhNYySv2] The reality star, for her part, later revealed that the former couple attempted to give their relationship one more try amid their divorce. “Jay and I actually went on a couple of dates, like, months and months and months ago," the Hills alum shared on the "Off the Vine" podcast in October 2021. “But then I was, like, it’s not there for me anymore.” According to the Uncommon James founder, the "scariest thing" she has ever done was get a divorce. "But it's been the best thing that I've ever done and that has really jumpstarted my journey on self-love and figuring out who I am now," she explained during an episode of "The School of Greatness" in June 2022. The businesswoman noted that her children influenced her outlook on the next chapter of her life. "My kids have inspired me to become the best version of myself," she added at the time. "I can only be as good to my kids as I am to myself. If I am empty, I have nothing to give them. Being able to be energized and love myself so I can love on my kids — and support them and encourage them — that's the most important thing." Scroll down for Cavallari and Cutler's most candid quotes about their split: [podcast_block]

Credit: UncommonJames/DennisLeupold/MEGA; Nam Y Huh/AP/Shutterstock

How Long It Took

"It was not an easy decision, obviously," the Laguna Beach alum told Entertainment Tonight in September 2020. "It was something that I truly thought about every single day for over two years."

At the time, the Colorado native referred to her divorce as "the hardest decision" she had to make, adding, "But I don't know, my mom used to say, 'You'll know when it's time.' I feel like that was true. I knew. And that's that."

Credit: Jim Smeal/BEI/Shutterstock

The Challenges

Cavallari explained that her and Cutler “had so much love for each other” until they “grew up.”

“A year ago I felt like I was drowning,” she told People in September 2020 about what led to her filing for divorce. “I’m proud for making this decision. I feel like my whole world is opening up now because of it, and I’m just feeling the best I’ve felt in a really long time."

Credit: Shutterstock (2)

The Reason Behind the Decision

“The thing with Jay is, we aren’t getting our divorce because of love lost, which made it really challenging because we were crazy about each other," Cavallari said on the "Off the Vine" podcast in October 2021. “And so I just decided I didn’t want to be in a toxic relationship anymore and I had to break it off."

Credit: MEGA; AP/Shutterstock

Making It Work

During an interview with Us Weekly, Cavallari opened up about the pair's approach to staying in each other's lives. “For me, it’s just about putting the kids first,” she explained in November 2021. “The kids are the only thing that matters and what’s best for them. That’s how I look at it. You’ve just got to make the most of it. … Luckily, we are able to spend it together, and I’m really grateful for that.”

Credit: Broadimage/Shutterstock

Looking Ahead

The TV personality made a conscious choice not to try dating again right after her split from the Indiana native. "It's gotten me to a really peaceful place. I feel the best I've ever felt in my whole life. I'm the happiest I've ever been," she said on an episode of "The School of Greatness" podcast in June 2022. "I'm no longer afraid of getting hurt."

She continued: "I'm actually excited to see who I can be in a new relationship because I feel like I've done so much work the last few years. I'm in no rush to be in a new relationship, but when I am, it will excite me to see how different I can be."

Credit: Cindy Barrymore/Shutterstock

Moving On

In June 2022, Cutler threw some shade at his estranged wife on his “Uncut” podcast, saying, “When the settlement came through, I threw a party." He also explained that he didn't “recommend divorce for anybody,” but noted that it was the right choice for him and Cavallari.

The jewelry designer, for her part, told TMZ, “I’ve been partying for two years straight."

Credit: Shutterstock (2)

Reflecting on the Past

During an appearance on the "Call Her Daddy" podcast, Cavallari referred to her marriage as "toxic."

"I mean, it took me a few years to actually pull the trigger, to be honest ... It was more just time. Nothing major happened at the end," she said, adding that she felt "really unhappy" before pulling the plug. "That was the bottom line. I was in an unhealthy relationship and so that, to me, is not worth it. Also, I didn't want my kids thinking that was normal and I wanted them to see me happy and see me, eventually — not right now, but eventually — see me with someone who really respects me and treats me the way I need to be treated."

Credit: AP/Shutterstock

Jay Weighs In

"If she wants to say stuff, she can say stuff," Cutler said during an August 2022 episode of the "Sofia With an F," responding to Cavallari's claims that their marriage was "toxic" before their 2020 split. "I'm not going to go down that road about her. I mean, she’s still the mother of my kids."

The retired athlete called his former spouse's revelations "comical" but conceded that Cavallari can "say whatever she wants" because that's "the way she feels." He added, "It's been two and a half years. Why are we having these conversations in public? Why are we doing this? We're done here."