While several of Joey Graziadei‘s Bachelor contestants appeared to get closure at the Women Tell All, Madina Alam admits she’s still “super confused” by what went down.
“I was so frustrated [while] watching and now I’m still frustrated,” Madina, who viewers know is 31, told Us Weekly after the Women Tell All taping. “I think I just feel like I was literally used as a prop.”
Earlier on in the season, Madina made a comment about feeling pressure to find The One as the oldest woman in the mansion. (During her interview with Us and another reporter, she explained that she “isn’t super close” with her family so she “deeply desire[s] to have my own family,” a detail viewers didn’t get to see. She also noted that her father is from Bangladesh and “still jokingly tries to arrange a marriage for me.”)
The remark ignited a series of confusing feuds on the show, initially between Madina and Maria Georgas, who Madina felt was dismissing her feelings. Sydney Gordon and Lea Cayanan started fiercely defending Madina (seemingly without her asking them to do so) and it resulted in a game of she-said, she-said between Maria, Sydney and Lea.
“At the end of the day, I’m allowed to feel how I want to feel. If you don’t agree with it, that’s completely fine. I didn’t bring up how I felt in regards to how anyone else felt. So the fact that it was even taken and talked about was kind of frustrating, but whatever,” Madina told Us. “I think the fact that then that comment was said to me, and then I had two people who I’d known for five days coming at me wanting me to do different things, and I’m like, ‘Whoa, I just opened up about this thing that people are bashing me for,’ which I’m allowed to have a feeling. And no one actually genuinely asked why I feel pressure, which was frustrating.”
The drama left fans (and Madina) trying to piece together how things escalated.
“I think it was just super confusing because then it was like I couldn’t be out of it until Maria and Sydney stopped, which I don’t have control over those two individuals because my name was in it, and it was so weird listening to everyone [say] my name,” she said. “There was one episode, I was laughing [watching]. I’m like, ‘My name, my name, my name,’ but I literally [am] nowhere to be found.”
Madina suggests that her desire to avoid confrontation could have played a part in Sydney and Lea taking over. “I definitely am the type of person that I am not going to argue,” she said. “I don’t need to prove my point. My ego is not that big. I do not care for you to apologize for me. You’re a different person and that doesn’t make you bad, and that’s OK.”
Still, Madina noted she feels “relieved” after wrapping the reunion.
“I feel like I really said what I felt like I wanted to say. I think while we were filming, I was definitely concerned about keeping my poise and gracefulness, if you will, and still speaking my mind and also just processing everything that was going on in the moment,” she said. “And so it was nice to finally speak what I had to speak and just trust that I was still going to do it in a respectful way.”
Joey’s journey with his final two contestants, Kelsey Anderson and Daisy Kent, concludes on ABC Monday, March 25, at 8 p.m. ET.
