Demi Moore Says She Lost Herself in Her Marriages to ‘Fit What Somebody Else Wanted’

Looking out for No. 1. Demi Moore learned to put herself first after prioritizing the needs of others throughout her marriages.

Demi Moore’s Dating History: A Timeline of Her Marriages, Flings

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The G.I. Jane star, 57, explained on the Tuesday, July 28, episode of SiriusXM’s The Jess Cagle Show that she had to heal after putting her desires on the backburner for years.

“It’s a process of learning to love yourself,” she said. “Accepting who you are just as you are. For me, I had changed myself so many times over and over to fit what I thought somebody else wanted.”

Moore continued, “It’s that idea that we’re kinda conditioned to work toward being desired, but we’re not supposed to have desires of our own. It really is commendable in our disposal times to go through the journey of really honoring the love that brought you together in the first place and to really give it everything you’ve got. But you can’t do that without that love and acceptance of yourself.”

Demi Moore attends the Vanity Fair Hollywood Calling Exhibition in 2020 Demi Moore Says She Lost Herself in Her Marriages to Fit What Somebody Else Wanted
Demi Moore attends the ‘Vanity Fair: Hollywood Calling’ Exhibition at the Annenberg Space for Photography in Los Angeles on February 4, 2020. AFF-USA/Shutterstock

The Ghost actress’ latest project — voicing the lead character on the erotic “Dirty Diana” podcast — explores the theme of women not knowing how to voice their own desires. Moore said that she has a connection to the character because she “fundamentally feels that she’s broken.”

Demi Moore and Bruce Willis' Relationship Through the Years

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The New Mexico native was married to Freddy Moore from 1980 to 1985, Bruce Willis from 1987 to 2000 and Ashton Kutcher from 2006 to 2013. She detailed the struggles of her marriages in her 2019 memoir, Inside Out.

Demi shared that she was concerned the Die Hard star, 65, was no longer invested in their marriage after she gave birth to their eldest daughter, Rumer, now 31. The former couple are also the parents of daughters Scout, 29, and Tallulah, 26.

Demi Moore and Bruce Willis and Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore Demi Moore attends the Vanity Fair Hollywood Calling Exhibition in 2020 Demi Moore Says She Lost Herself in Her Marriages to Fit What Somebody Else Wanted
Demi Moore and Bruce Willis in 1997 and Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore in 2011. Dave Allocca/Starpix/Shutterstock; Bei/Shutterstock

“But Bruce didn’t want to be the guy who walked out on his family, who did that to his kid,” she wrote. “When he left to do Hudson Hawk, things were in a very precious state. I went over to visit once, and, frankly, I had the feeling that he had screwed around.”

10 Revelations From Demi Moore’s Book

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As for Kutcher, 42, Demi claimed that the That ’70s Show alum suggested they have threesomes during their marriage. News broke in 2011 that Kutcher had allegedly cheated and she wrote that the No Strings Attached star confessed to his infidelity “right away.” The St. Elmo’s Fire star blamed herself for allowing “a third party” into their relationship.

Demi told Diane Sawyer on Good Morning America in September 2019 that she “lost me” during her marriage to Kutcher. “I think the thing if I were to look back, I would say I blinded myself and I lost myself,” she said at the time.

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