Carly Waddell Gets Candid About Love on 1st Valentine’s Day Without Evan Bass: ‘It Takes 2 People to Be in a Relationship’

Credit: YouTube; ABC

Carly Waddell Gets Candid About Love on 1st Valentine's Day Without Evan Bass: ‘It Takes 2 People to Be in a Relationship’

Carly Waddell took to YouTube to give relationship advice amid her divorce from Evan Bass — and ended up giving Bachelor Nation new insight into how she's coping post-split. “Today, I would like you to think of me not as Carly Waddell: Girl who constantly got rejected on The Bachelor until she found love … and then that didn't also work out. I would like you to think of me as Carly Waddell: Love Guru,” the 35-year-old former cruise ship singer began in a YouTube video titled “Valentine’s Day Love Advice” on Sunday, February 14. “[I] will be answering your tough relationship questions with probably terrible advice.” Waddell answered a series of questions submitted by her Instagram followers, including whether she believes in love at first sight. “I had one person, obviously, it was not Evan, I had one person that I remember very distinctly meeting this person and I remember walking into the room … it was a friend of a friend,” she recalled. “I remember seeing this person and I felt like it took my breath away. And it wasn't because he was the most handsome person or anything.” Waddell continued: “I do know that we had some type of connection. And he had it too, but it wasn't love because it never actually went anywhere — just, like, years after years after years of bad timing, but it wasn't love at first sight.” After another fan asked whether she believes in soulmates, Waddell replied, “This is coming from a place of where I'm at in life right now. I think that there's a lot of people out there that can work with a lot of different people.” The Bachelor season 19 alum met Bass, 38, while filming season 3 of Bachelor in Paradise in 2016. The following year, the pair returned to Mexico to exchange vows. The twosome, who share daughter Bella, 3, and son Charlie, 15 months, announced their split in December 2020. [jwplayer gBATqdGS-l3ahXupL] “We have made the difficult decision to separate,” they said in a joint statement on December 23. “We will always cherish our time together and continue to have the utmost respect for one another as we focus on what’s best for the future of our family. We greatly appreciate everyone’s love and support and kindly ask that you please respect our family’s privacy as we navigate through this.” After Bass’ first wife, Marie, alleged that he and Waddell secretly split nearly two years before it was announced, the singer fired back in a different YouTube video. “There’s been weird stuff going on about people asking me when we separated. We separated the day after Thanksgiving. We’ve been going to therapy for years,” Waddell said last month without naming Marie. “We tried for a really long time to make it work. We went to therapy. We focused a lot more on the kids than we focused on ourselves and, ultimately, I think that was our biggest downfall. … If you don’t have a foundation for yourself, then you crumble.” While Waddell has referenced her single status several times via her YouTube channel, Bass, for his part, has stayed quiet amid the divorce. “Evan is much more private,” a source told Us Weekly last month. “He is not going to go on social media to open up about what happened. Of course, this has affected him and he’s trying to just move on and handle it privately.” Scroll through for more of Waddell’s candid quotes from her Valentine’s Day video:

Credit: Courtesy of Carly Waddell/Instagram

‘How Do You Know It's Really Over?’

“I wish I had the answer to this one,” she said, adding she recently heard someone say, “You know you’re in the wrong relationship when you’re compromising too much of yourself.”

Waddell explained: “I know that compromises happen, but when your inner-being is like compromising every single thing that you believe in. So, if you feel that way, I would say it's over. If somebody's telling you, it's over, there’s nothing you can do about that. It takes two people to be in a relationship. … You can't change that person's mind. This is a thing that I realized in life now. I can't change someone's mind. … When relationships are over, it’s really sad. But there's a lot of growth that happens in that there's a lot of, like, understanding that happens, like, way later.”

Credit: YouTube

‘Do I Believe in Soulmates, One True Love?’

“I think there are multiple people that could love you in a miraculous, amazing way. And I think that you could also feel the same about multiple people,” she said.

Credit: YouTube

‘What Qualities Do You Need in Yourself to be Able to Find Love With Someone Else?’

“For the most part, you have to, like, love yourself first and give yourself enough love and attention and compassion and awareness to be able to find your own happiness and not seek it through other people,” Waddell said. “Because I think when you love yourself, you end up exuding this, like, peace and love and confidence. And I feel like that's what also draws people in.”

Credit: Courtesy of Carly Waddell/Instagram

‘How Do I Deal with Ending a Four-Year Relationship?’

“I feel like communication is the biggest hurdle of everything even in your friendships. You got to be honest with this person and tell them exactly how you're feeling. But you also have to do it with, like, some type of compassion,” the reality TV personality responded. “You need to really, like, set out some quality time to have the real convo and be as honest as possible so they can also get closure. And maybe ask them, ‘Do you have any questions?’ I feel like one question they would probably say is, ‘How long have you been feeling this?’ You need to have answers to questions and let them ask those questions.”

Credit: YouTube

‘Biggest Red Flags In Dating?’

“I am really bad at seeing red flags. I think I see them and then I make excuses for them. So, I'm like, ‘Oh, god, that’s, like, really bad that that happened. Well, that's OK. It's just because this, this, this [or] this,’” Waddell admitted. “If there's a red flag, don’t, like, laser in and only see that forever, like, give a person a couple chances. But then if red flags keep popping up and keep popping up, I personally feel like stop making excuses for bad behavior because you're worth more than that bad behavior from that person.”

Credit: YouTube

‘What Is the Best Way to Meet Someone Right Now?’

“It’s a hard world. … We actually did an episode on ‘Mommies Tell All’ [podcast] with a dating coach that was really interesting about virtual dating, which is funny, because when we were having this conversation, I was married so I just wasn’t even thinking about it. And now I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh,’” Waddell said. “If you're comfortable with virtual dating, I say just try it. Because the more dating you do, the better you're going to get at it, the more people you meet, the closer you are to finding someone anyway. If you're not putting yourself out there at all, you're never gonna find somebody.”

Credit: MEGA

‘Do I Believe in Second Chances?’

“I believe in second chances when behind the second chance is a person actually wanting to change and saying, ‘I messed up, I'm willing to do anything possible to help this situation.’ I believe in those second chances,” she said. “I don't believe in second chances that are, like, half-assed second chances that are like, 'I'm in 35 percent.' No, you're in 100 percent or you're out 100 percent.”