Demi Lovato Explains What ’29’ Is Really About and More ‘Call Her Daddy’ Revelations

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Demi Lovato Explains What '29' Is Really About and More 'Call Her Daddy' Revelations

Opening up — and not holding back. Demi Lovato detailed her experiences as a child star in a new interview and explained the real meaning of her new song "29." The "Cool for the Summer" singer, 30, discussed everything from their early days on Disney to their new album, HOLY FVCK, during an interview on the Wednesday, August 24, episode of Alex Cooper's "Call Her Daddy" podcast. "I've just had a lot of trauma in my life," the Sonny With a Chance alum explained. "There's a persistence, a determination, inside of me. I think I learned that from, like, the bullying experience of like, 'You can turn this around and make it into something great.'" The pop star revealed that they're sober again after leaving treatment in December 2021. "I feel great," Lovato said, explaining how they felt while recording the new album. "But there were all these emotions that I left treatment with. And I wanted to convey them in my music. And so the first few songs are, like, really angry. And it's like, 'This is who I am. Take it or leave it.'" [jwplayer l7B2gCzW-zhNYySv2] Earlier this month, the "Confident" artist made headlines for their new song "29," which seemingly hinted at their relationship with ex-boyfriend Wilmer Valderrama. The Camp Rock star and the That '70s Show alum, 42, dated from 2010 to 2016. When they met, Lovato was 17 and Valderrama was 29. The Grammy nominee hasn't confirmed that the song is specifically about the Grey's Anatomy veteran, but they've been open about how difficult it was to release the track. “I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a ton of anxiety about putting out this song,” Lovato told Zane Lowe during an Apple Music interview earlier this month. “I just said, ‘I have to go for this. I have to own my truth.’ … Sometimes saying less is more.” The "Sorry Not Sorry" singer addressed speculation about the "29" lyrics during their "Call Me Daddy" interview, but they also spent some time talking about the present — and their new romance with Jordan Lutes, a.k.a. Jute$. "It's going really well," Lovato said of their relationship with the 25-year-old musician. The duo went public with their romance earlier this month after working together on HOLY FVCK. When Lovato celebrated their birthday on Saturday, August 20, Lutes gushed over his partner in a sweet Instagram post marking the occasion. "I’m the luckiest schmuck in the world cuz i get to call [you] mine,” the Canada native wrote at the time. “Making [you] laugh has become my new obsession cuz ur smile literally cures my depression. … I’m so proud of [you] for not only surviving everything you’ve been through but coming out on top and becoming [your] healthiest happiest sweetest self.” Keep scrolling for more revelations from Lovato's "Call Her Daddy" interview. [podcast_block]

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Demi's Tough Childhood

The "Tell Me You Love Me" singer said their father, who died in 2013, "wasn't really in" their life. Their mother, meanwhile, had an eating disorder that affected a young Lovato, who developed bulimia herself after competing in pageants as a kid. “Beauty pageants are awful for children’s self esteem," the musician explained. "They teach you to ignore your emotions until you go to your hotel room and can cry it out. It was this toxic environment of who is more beautiful. … At such a young age, it confuses you.” 

Lovato also revealed that she began struggling with depression before turning 10. “I had this understanding that life was only going to get more difficult," they recalled, adding that they "had suicidal ideations at the age of 7.” 

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The Disney Grind

The Glee alum claimed they and their fellow Disney stars "lived in fear" of any scandals coming to public light. “If something happened, there would be conversations," Lovato said. "That pressure of ‘You are replaceable’ was always there."

That period of their life was also super busy. “Every year I filmed a season of a TV show, I went on tour, I made an album and I shot a movie. I did that for three or four years," Lovato recalled. "If I had a hiatus from my show, I would have the tour bus pull up to the studio and take me on tour for one week or I would fly to London to do promo.” 

Lovato believes that "extreme work load" helped push them to unhealthy habits. “At a certain point, I was paying for the roof over my whole family’s head,” they explained. “It was that pressure of, 'I am paying for everything and I need to keep going because if things start to disappear, so do the finances.'” 

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When Their Addiction Battle Began

"I started experimenting for the first time when I was 12 or 13," Lovato said. "I got into a car accident and they prescribed me opiates. My mom didn't think she would have to lock up the opiates from her 13-year-old daughter, but I was already drinking at that point. I had been bullied and was looking for an escape.”

After their mom took away those pills, Lovato began stealing their mother's Xanax. "At 17, it was the first time I tried coke and, like, loved it too much," they recalled. "And then [that] kinda bled into me going to treatment right after I turned 18."

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Their Team's Influence

Lovato had a sober companion after their first experience in rehab, but they alleged that person eventually caused additional harm. "It became controlling around my food," they recalled. “I’ve never talked about this before, but there was one time where I had binged and purged one night and I came clean to my team.” According to Lovato, the team then “barricaded" them in their hotel room. "I put all of my trust and faith into people around me who didn’t have my best interest at heart," they added. 

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The Meaning of '29'

Lovato still didn't specify whether "29" is about Valderrama, noting that the choice of the song title was also about a realization they had when they were 29, having recently finished treatment. “I came out of treatment with anger, I came out of treatment with understanding and growth," they explained. "It was a reflective song for me. Even though there’s undertones of anger, I really learned a lot about that experience and I decided to write about it.”

Still, the Disney alum acknowledged the lyrics' secondary message about age gaps in romantic relationships. “If you’re a young girl and you think that it’s sexy or fun to date older men, it’s not OK unless you’re of age," Lovato said. “I think sometimes the public needs the truth, and that’s why I decided to release it as a single because I think the message is so important.”