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Tanner Tolbert Describes ‘Easier’ Relationship With Son Brooks After Initially Struggling to Bond

Bonding with his boy! Tanner Tolbert is having an “easier” time getting along with his 7-month-old son, Brooks, after initially struggling to connect with him.

Related: These 'Bachelor' and 'Bachelorette' Babies Will Melt Your Heart

“Awhile back on Jade [Roper’s] podcast, I made a comment about how it was taking me a minute to build a bond with Brooks after he was born,” the Bachelorette alum, 32, captioned a Wednesday, March 11, Instagram post. “It was the truth and that’s OK. After Brooks was born, I found myself comparing my bond with him to the bond I had with [my daughter], Emmy, and I think that was unfair for me to do to myself. My relationship with Emmy had built up over a couple years, whereas I had just met Brooks. As a man, I didn’t just spend 9 months being pregnant with him, building a bond that way like my wife did. Plus, let me tell ya, babies are hard work. A lot harder than I imagined (I was away at work during most of Emmy’s time as a newborn so in a way, this is my first experience being around it 24/7).”

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I normally like to keep it lighthearted on social media… but wanted to take a second to talk about my little dude here. A while back on Jades podcast I made a comment about how it was taking me a minute to build a bond with Brooks after he was born… afterwards, a bunch of media outlets posted headlines about that… and to be honest I felt kind of ashamed as I read them… that I shouldn’t feel that way… or that I was a “bad dad” for saying that… but as time has gone on, I’m glad I did, because it was the truth and that’s okay. After Brooks was born I found myself comparing my bond with him to the bond I had with Emmy and I think that was unfair for me to do to myself. My relationship with Emmy had built up over a couple years whereas I had just met Brooks…. and as a man I didn’t just spend 9 months being pregnant with him, building a bond that way, like my wife did… plus, let me tell ya… babies are hard work, haha… A lot harder than I imagined (I was away at work during most of Emmys time as a newborn so in a way this is my first experience being around it 24/7) – so after he was born I found myself taking the easier route in parenthood, handling most of Emmys needs and letting Jade handle most of Brooks’. But as time has gone on it’s gotten easier for me… Brooks has started to show such personality and the older he’s gotten I feel more equipped to take care of him. I love him the exact same as I do Emmy and I’d do anything for either of my kids. Anyways, this caption is starting to get a little long… and I’m not exactly sure why I’m posting this… maybe it’s to make myself feel better… and not feel like a “bad dad” for👍🏼 feeling the way I did… or maybe it’s just because I wanted to share my feelings in case you, or your partner feels the same way I did. Either way, everyone’s parenting journey is going to be a little different and that’s okay… just love your kids as much as you can and enjoy every moment. It’s the best job you will ever have❤️

A post shared by Tanner Tolbert (@tanner.tolbert) on

The Missouri native went on to write that he took “the easier route in parenthood, handling most of Emmy’s needs and letting Jade handle most of Brooks’.” Now, Tolbert is having an “easier” time bonding with his baby.

Related: Jade Roper Claps Back at Parenting Police Over Breast-Feeding and More

“Brooks has started to show such personality and the older he’s gotten, I feel more equipped to take care of him,” the former auto finance manager explained. “I love him the exact same as I do Emmy, and I’d do anything for either of my kids. … Everyone’s parenting journey is going to be a little different and that’s OK. Just love your kids as much as you can and enjoy every moment. It’s the best job you will ever have.”

Tanner-Tolbert-Shares-Update-on-Relationship-With-Son-Brooks-After-Initially-Struggling-to-Bond
Tanner Tolbert and Brooks Courtesy of Tanner Tolbert/Instagram

In August, he opened up to Nick Viall about Brooks wanting Roper, 33, “all the time.” He explained on the episode of “The Viall Files” podcast: “I will love them equally, for different reasons, but I feel it right now more with Emmy and I don’t know why. … I don’t have milk here to provide.”

When the former Bachelor, 39, asked, “Do you kinda feel like he doesn’t really want you so you’re like, ‘Ah, f–k it, I don’t really want you either?’” Tolbert replied, “Maybe a little bit. In nicer words than that, yes.”

Related: Celeb Moms Clap Back at the Parenting Police

He and the Colorado native welcomed their son in July 2019, two years after Emerson’s birth. The couple met and fell in love on season 2 of Bachelor in Paradise, tying the knot in January 2016.

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