The Call Me By Your Name star, 34, spent much of his quarantine with his family in the Cayman Islands. After an “intense” few months of “really concentrated family time,” Hammer and his wife of 10 years, Elizabeth Chambers, confirmed they were calling it quits. The estranged pair share two children, daughter Harper, 5, and son Ford, 3.
“Look, I don’t think you’ll find anyone in the world who would ever say what I’m going through is an easy thing to go through,” the Social Network actor told British GQ in a candid interview published on Wednesday, September 30. “It’s not about whether it was your idea or not, or whether you think it’s the right idea or you don’t. Either way, a separation like this is a seriously seismic event in someone’s life. And there’s a lot of shifting and a lot of growing pains and a lot of changes.”
While Hammer admitted that he doesn’t “always” view change as a “bad thing,” it doesn’t come without its challenges — especially when there are kids involved.
“Elizabeth and I are two adults making this decision and the priority is how do we do it in a way that affects our children the least?” he added. “Or, at least, how do we help get them through this in a way that mitigates as much consternation or fear or damage on their part, you know?”
Hammer and the Bird Bakery owner, 38, tied the knot in May 2010 and announced their split via Instagram in July after “thirteen years as best friends, soulmates, partners and then parents.” Despite their “incredible journey” together, the estranged duo was ready to “turn the page and move on” and vowed to commit to coparenting cordially.
Shortly after their separation made headlines, an insider told Us Weekly exclusively that the longtime couple had been “having trouble in their marriage for quite a while and [were] each doing their own thing.”
The Man From Uncle actor has been enjoying his freedom since returning from the Cayman Islands. Earlier this month, he was seen roaming around California with Rumer Willis, and days later, sat down for lunch with writer Jessica Ciencin Henriquez in West Hollywood. The change of scenery was apparently needed after spending a “tough” couple of months on island time.
“We couldn’t leave the apartment, couldn’t go in the pool, couldn’t do anything,” he told British GQ of his family’s experience in the Cayman Islands. “It was a very complicated, intense situation, with big personalities all locked in a little tiny place. … It was just this thing that snuck up on everybody. I don’t think I handled it very well. I think, to be quite frank, I came very close to completely losing my mind. I just felt completely powerless.”
Now, Hammer is meeting with his therapist “twice a week” to work through both his personal struggles and the lasting impacts of feeling “isolated” amid the coronavirus pandemic.
“It just sort of regulated everything and gave me the tools for dealing with things. It gave me a fresh perspective and it was incredibly helpful,” he explained. “I’ve been in therapy before, but this was a dire situation. And now I just think everyone needs to be in therapy, period, across the board. Everyone needs to be talking to someone and if you’re not, you’re doing something wrong.”