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Hilaria Baldwin Says She Didn’t Think She Would ‘Make It Through’ This Year After ‘Dark Struggles’

Why Hilaria Baldwin Didn’t Think She Would ‘Make It’ Amid ‘Challenging’ Year
Hilaria Baldwin. Stephen Lovekin/Shutterstock

Getting candid. Hilaria Baldwin opened up about gratitude in a heartfelt Thanksgiving message.

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“I didn’t take a photo of my whole family today. Here is Carmen and Marilu dancing in the supermarket 😂❤️,” Baldwin, 37, captioned Instagram footage of her daughters on Thursday, November 25. “I want to tell you all how grateful I am for you. This has been one 💥 of a challenging year. I know for many, many of us … but I will only speak from personal experience right now.”

The yoga instructor continued to address her followers: “Sometimes I didn’t think I was gonna make it through. I want you to know how much you have helped me through some pretty dark struggles. Knowing you were there — such [a] comfort. Yes, my children and my husband, my family and close friends have been invaluable … but YOU, I don’t get to express this face to face, due to the nature of social media and how far we all are. I SO want you to know and take in how grateful I am every day for you. I miss our chats and the safety net of our community. I’m hoping, one day, we will get back there.”

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While Baldwin didn’t divulge the nature of her “struggles” in her post, she revealed that she has since learned to say “I love you more,” concluding, “It’s what all of this is all about, in my opinion. So, I love you so with my whole, grateful soul. Happy gratitude day.”

Weeks earlier, the mother of six — she shares Carmen, 8, Rafael, 6, Leonardo, 5, Romeo, 3, Eduardo, 13 months, and Lucia, 9 months, with husband Alec Baldwin — vocalized her support for the 30 Rock alum, 63, after he made headlines for accidentally shooting crew members with a prop gun on the set of Rust, killing cinematographer Halyna Hutchins.

“I love you and I’m here❤️,” Hilaria shared an Instagram snap of the married couple — who wed in June 2012 — holding hands on October 30.

The Yoga Vida cofounder broke her silence on the fatal shooting earlier that month, expressing her concern over her partner’s wellbeing moving forward.

“I brought [Alec] up here because we have to mourn Halyna’s death. Alec had a really traumatic thing happen, and I am trying to limit the PTSD,” she told the New York Post in October after the couple were photographed together in Vermont. “He needs space for me to take care of him and his mental health. It’s an awful thing that happened. Alec feels awful.”

The Massachusetts native added at the time: “I didn’t know where I was going, I just drove. I just drove around and around and around with my kids … I drove around for an entire day trying to find a place.”

Hutchins was 42 when she was fatally struck by the prop’s misfire in October. The Boss Baby star also hit director Joel Souza, who suffered injuries and was later released from a nearby hospital.

After the incident, Alex expressed his condolences in a Twitter statement, declaring that he was “fully cooperating with the police investigation” in response to the “tragic accident.”

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In addition to helping her husband cope in the wake of the on-set accident, Hilaria has also dealt wither own emotionally draining events over the past year. After receiving backlash in late 2020 for allegedly appropriating Spanish culture and misrepresenting her heritage, the wellness guru returned to social media in February with a new perspective.

“I’ve spent the last month listening, reflecting, and asking myself how I can learn and grow,” Hilaria wrote via Instagram at the time. “My parents raised my brother and me with two cultures, American and Spanish, and I feel a true sense of belonging to both. The way I’ve spoken about myself and my deep connection to two cultures could have been better explained—I should have been more clear and I’m sorry. I’m proud of the way I was raised, and we’re raising our children to share the same love and respect for both. Being vulnerable and pushing ourselves to learn and grow is what we’ve built our community on, and I hope to get back to the supportive and kind environment we’ve built together.”

In March, she opened up about suffering pregnancy losses prior to welcoming her youngest children, who arrived within less than six months of each other. (Hilaria gave birth to Eduardo in September 2020, while Lucia was born via surrogate the following year.)

“Our hearts are filled with so much gratitude,” the Living Clearly Method author wrote via Instagram in March. “The Baldwinitos craved so much to have a little sister. Many of you may remember the loss of their sister at four months in the end of 2019. There isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t ache for our daughter. When I found out our baby had died, I told our children that their sister was going to come, just not at that time. Nothing will ever replace her, but two wonderful souls have come into our lives, and we are humbled to know them.”

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